On being a Recruiter's wife

Unfortunately, I had no idea what I was walking into when we received this job. I had to stop and think for a minute as I wrote that last statement. Was it truly unfortunate? I surmised that indeed, it was. There is warning for the potential recruiter, but no one warns the wife. Regardless, Daniel and I knew this job was going to be hard, but we can do hard, we thought. We weren't afraid of hard. What we didn't know was that this job was going to reduce us to human beings barely able to limp along.

Everybody knows that Recruiters have a really tough job. Those who are on the inside really, really understand; but those that know the best are the ones who nobody sees. Me, or possibly you. The wife of a Recruiter. We are left holding the man who has been beaten up, ripped apart, told he's less than no good. We feel his feelings. Beaten up and ripped apart, yet holding an enormous amount of fierce protectiveness towards the one who we know is good enough. Plus, our own state of mind- exhaustion, fear, anger, disgust... the list goes on.

So many times I have felt like I just wanted to run away. Coward, you say. No, I stayed. I stayed and I prayed, for relief, for a break, sometimes for a miracle. I never left, not even in my mind. This man I married needed me and I needed him. I was the one who would whisper to him " You are amazing, you can do this!", " We're almost there, just a little bit more time". And he is the one who would hold me as I cried.

We see what nobody else sees or cares about. Children crying for their father, the thousand dinners eaten alone, the telephone that embodies everything anti-family, the sadness on the face of Daniel because he misses so much.

Is it all bad? No, not all bad. I have grown more through this than any time prior in my life. I think back and would still choose to walk this road. I am here because I needed to be here. These circumstances were exactly right for what needed to be accomplished in my life. I am so much better for it.

I also developed deep trust in Daniel. I trusted him before this time but it had never been tried. What I discovered is that he truly is a man of character; unwilling to compromise. He doesn't lie, he doesn't cheat, and he is full of integrity.

Our marriage has survived, dare I say, even thrived; and when it comes our family, I have seen his heart. I see that he comes home to us every night. I have seen the sacrifice it takes to say no to his own desires for his family's greater good.

As for my husband, he has evolved into a determined man able to handle himself in any situation. Bold, charismatic, well-spoken. Taking no for an answer? Absolutely not! There is always a way to get what you want. A smile here, a growl there. He knows just what to do.

I come out of this tired and needing a serious vacation, yet so strong. I'm able to say how proud I am to be a Recruiter's wife. There is victory even for me.