Flowers from Daniel after I had ElizaDaniel doesn't bring me flowers very often and quite frankly, he finds doing those type of romantic gestures kind of hard.
We've had discussions about this, you know.
At first I have to say I was disappointed that he wasn't that kind of man. The kind that is always thinking of ways to knock a woman's socks off... flowers, vacations, chocolates, sappy cards. I would get frustrated and feel jipped that he didn't think of these fantastic ways of showing me his love. But then I calmed down after a couple of years and settled into loving who Daniel is. I made a study of my husband and found out the ways he shows his love. And what I found knocked my socks off.
He is smart - I know I can ask him any number of hard questions and he'll either know the answer or he finds it out. He is devoted to me - he comes home as soon as he can every night. He doesn't go anywhere else... he just comes home. And he dives right into helping me out. He doesn't think about how tired he is from work or whether he deserves to have a break, he just makes it all about me. He is openly affectionate - he loves me with his words and his arms. I never feel unloved. So though he may not bring me home flowers, he does my dishes and vacuums the floors; he makes keeping the house as clean as I like it to be a priority because he knows it is important to me.
I love knowing him intimately. And because I do, I can see the ways he loves me clearly without the flowers and chocolates.
We've had discussions about this, you know.
At first I have to say I was disappointed that he wasn't that kind of man. The kind that is always thinking of ways to knock a woman's socks off... flowers, vacations, chocolates, sappy cards. I would get frustrated and feel jipped that he didn't think of these fantastic ways of showing me his love. But then I calmed down after a couple of years and settled into loving who Daniel is. I made a study of my husband and found out the ways he shows his love. And what I found knocked my socks off.
He is smart - I know I can ask him any number of hard questions and he'll either know the answer or he finds it out. He is devoted to me - he comes home as soon as he can every night. He doesn't go anywhere else... he just comes home. And he dives right into helping me out. He doesn't think about how tired he is from work or whether he deserves to have a break, he just makes it all about me. He is openly affectionate - he loves me with his words and his arms. I never feel unloved. So though he may not bring me home flowers, he does my dishes and vacuums the floors; he makes keeping the house as clean as I like it to be a priority because he knows it is important to me.
I love knowing him intimately. And because I do, I can see the ways he loves me clearly without the flowers and chocolates.
Daniel loves me with his whole heart... could I really ask for anything more?
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Oh this reminds me so much of Matt. I used to complain about not getting all the flowers,candy & etc... After Iraq I learned so fast thats not what it's about at all. Matt does the same. He comes straight in from work & starts helping me. Without even skipping a beat. They may not do all the story book romance stuff but they get it ya know. They understand what we need & it's taken care of. Besides that when you do happen to get some flowers or a nice surprise it's like a huge event LOL!
This post reminded me so much of me and Jordan. I wish I had figured some of this out before I got married - I wasted a lot of time wishing he was different, (and making Jordan feel like he wasn't good enough).
I found out that God didn't give me the kind of man I wanted - he gave me the kind of man I needed. I've got a man who loves me in way those girls who get all the flowers and chocolates just wish for :)
I have this kind of man too. We're very lucky women!
I just started reading your blog recently and enjoy reading about your and your family. Congratulations on your beautiful new daughter and Happy New Year!
I so needed to read this post today. My perspective has been a little skewed the past few days and tension has filled the air. I just finished reading my blog posts from the time while Q was in Iraq and it reminded me of why I love him and how petty all this stuff that has stolen my joy lately really is...then I read your post and I'm like, "wow, is everyone reading my mind today." Thank you for reminding me to love my husband for who he is!!
So true, loving who they are not who you want them to be.
What a beautiful post about the man you love.
No you couldn't. Scott is the same way with birthdays and holidays and I get aggravated...but it's the surprises in my life he gives me that remind me how much I love him......
i had it in my head that all men know that women love flowers, teddy bears, cards, etc... and that they love to "dream up" the next big deal. ha! and that's ok now... took a while to realize it all. but it makes the occasional card, hug, sink full of dishes all the more important. i certainly can't overlook it if it's on the rare-er side. never taken for granted. what a wonderful man i married.
What a beautiful post, Andrea! I was really just poppin' over to say Happy New Year to you, but your post stopped me in my tracks. I'm married to a guy like that but have been a little cranky lately with everything we have going on, and less than appreciative. Thanks for the reminder to love the men God gave us for who they are, not for who we think they should be. (But the flowers were a nice touch!)
Blessings to you...more than you can handle!
xoxoxo
-Bronie
J. is so much like this, too. I have learned that the things he does are so much more important and speak so much more of who he is than flowers, etc. ever could. It is always helpful for me to remember that the reasons I fell in love with him had nothing to do with his bringing home gifts. It was him being himself, a man of great character. I love him so much for it!
Your Daniel and my Bryan sound very much alike. How blessed we are!
Great Post! Like so many of the other girls... I have this kind of man too. And aren't we blessed!
Have a great day!
-Brittany
it's funny how much alike you and I are, and Joe and Daniel! I was the same way -thinking I really wanted all those typical romantic gestures, but Joe isn't quite like that either. And if I have to ask him to do that, or remind him, or whatever, then it just isn't the same, it won't mean the same. I've also come to realize all the little things he does shows me how much he loves me. Especially when I listen to other women complain about all the things their hubbys don't do it makes me realize how lucky I am. Glad you've found that in Daniel too!
I've missed out on reading your blogs for a couple of weeks Andrea, so I went back to read what I had missed.
This blog was one of my favorites that I've read from you. When my husband and I first started dating he would send flowers. Sometimes 2 dozen, that didn't last very long and sometimes, even now that would irriate me and I would wonder why he was not one of those men who would send flowers or other little treats.
However, I realized that like your husband he always comes right home after work. He cooks for me, cleans up the kitchen, helps organize the house and so many other things that mean more then some little trinket he brought home.
Thanks for putting this into perspective for me.
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