Why is it that I read the scale (evil, evil little things!) and it says:
"Hey Andrea! You only have 6 more pounds to lose and you'll be back to normal! Whoo-hoo..."
But I feel like I am bigger than ever. Seriously, I feel like a beached whale. I just don't get it. I haven't been eating badly, pretty normal, well except for a minor Chex mix issue.
I am at the point of feeling as if I will never shed these last few pounds. And I know I will - after three kids I think I have figured my body out - I know it takes my body about a year to get back to normal. But, I'd like to buck the system and be at my normal weight by the end of September.
Sigh. We'll see though. Eliza is still nursing like a champ, and while breastfeeding my body stores fat like we're headed into a famine. Apparently so does Eliza's. Case in point:
Take note of the jowls and double chin, not to mention the chubby arms. It looks cute on her, me... not so much.
You know, honestly, sometimes I get really frustrated to even be thinking about this weight issue. I weigh 131 pounds. For my height - 5' 8" that is not fat, but I feel like it. And as much as I would love to blame it on "Hollywood" and all the stigmas surrounding it (anyone else feel anger towards Nicole Kidman and her immediate look of never having a baby?) I can not. I put this 'need' to get back to my pre-children weight on myself. But why? I have had three children. I shouldn't, can't, won't ever look like I have not. Why do I expect so much from myself? Why do I load up the guilt when I see myself in the mirror and I look like a nursing mother?
I know I am not the only one that struggles with these feelings - anger, laziness, apathy, frustration, feelings of never "getting there." Anybody in this boat with me? I need some company!
"Hey Andrea! You only have 6 more pounds to lose and you'll be back to normal! Whoo-hoo..."
But I feel like I am bigger than ever. Seriously, I feel like a beached whale. I just don't get it. I haven't been eating badly, pretty normal, well except for a minor Chex mix issue.
I am at the point of feeling as if I will never shed these last few pounds. And I know I will - after three kids I think I have figured my body out - I know it takes my body about a year to get back to normal. But, I'd like to buck the system and be at my normal weight by the end of September.
Sigh. We'll see though. Eliza is still nursing like a champ, and while breastfeeding my body stores fat like we're headed into a famine. Apparently so does Eliza's. Case in point:
Take note of the jowls and double chin, not to mention the chubby arms. It looks cute on her, me... not so much.
You know, honestly, sometimes I get really frustrated to even be thinking about this weight issue. I weigh 131 pounds. For my height - 5' 8" that is not fat, but I feel like it. And as much as I would love to blame it on "Hollywood" and all the stigmas surrounding it (anyone else feel anger towards Nicole Kidman and her immediate look of never having a baby?) I can not. I put this 'need' to get back to my pre-children weight on myself. But why? I have had three children. I shouldn't, can't, won't ever look like I have not. Why do I expect so much from myself? Why do I load up the guilt when I see myself in the mirror and I look like a nursing mother?
I know I am not the only one that struggles with these feelings - anger, laziness, apathy, frustration, feelings of never "getting there." Anybody in this boat with me? I need some company!
31 Comments:
Oh Andrea...I wish I could give you a hug right now!! You are beautiful!
I completely understand how you feel!! It took me a full year to lose all the weight after I had Hannah. And it was extra frustrating because my sister in law, whose little boy is only seven weeks older than Hannah, was literally back in her normal clothes in six weeks...grrrrrrrrrrrrr! It is so hard not to compare yourself to other people or even to your "pre-baby" self. And I really think that all women, whether they have had babies or not, just feel really fat sometimes. Even if we know we aren't, sometimes you still feel that way. Blah!!
Sending you lots of "bloggy buddy" hugs, smiles, and understanding! :)
Aiii yi YI! What a really bad time to ask you to re-send me your address for your Godiva Give-Away prize! So sorry Sister~Friend! I hear ya though! My weight is s-l-i-g-h-t-y higher than yours, but it really does not matter whether it is 6 pounds or 116 pounds...it all BITES BIG TIME!
Hope your day turns around when Daniel arrives home and all is Peace and Harmony again!
I am sending you (((hugs...lots 'o hugs)))
You know what?I just gained three lbs while visiting my grandparents. (My grandma is an awesome cook!) Three lbs is not a big deal, but 3 lbs in 10 days is alarming. Last night when my poor child was throwing up time after time after time, I had the crazy notion.. hmm.. if I catch this thing I'll get rid of those three lbs.. And then my wish was granted. I've cursed yesterday-Rachel time and time again for thinking that.
Anyway, all that's to say, weight issues make us crazy. You're beautiful and look AMAZING for having three children. If only I could be so lucky!
Okay..been there and done this...Eliza is not even 1. i always felt as if my body should be back to normal at 1 year old. It always was...your body went through alot...3 times....I think as women we never really think we look 18 again after the first baby and we dont..we are mommas and that is just a stage of life. I'm sure you look fine. So be happy and proud you are so thin at your height. I think you should treat yourself to a manicure or pedicure so it will make you feel a little better...that is what I do...
Oh Andrea, I only wish I weighed 131 LOL I'm only 5'4 and I weigh 138 and I can't blame it on my pregnancy weight considering my last baby is 5 years old. I just blame the food, I love food, all kinds LOL
I totally understand your frustration though, I do the same to myself, I don't care how long it will take to loose the weight the right way, I want it gone NOW. Hang in there, you are doing awesome and I'm sure before you know it you will be back down to the weight you want :)
Hugs,
Sandra
When I was pregnant, I learned something in my Lamaze classes that really surprised me, Andrea. You can lose the weight. You can actually weigh less than you did before you got pregnant.
But...it takes seven years for your bones to get back into their original positions. The rib cage is spread more. And so forth.
131 for your height is a great weight. But chances are, your body just feels different and is going to for quite a while. The one thing that made me feel better about myself was consciously exercising, but boy, I hated that.
You're definitely not alone. I'm sure anyone who's had three babies has the same feelings. But you look wonderful, so try not to stress over it.
Okay, barring the fact that I'm pregnant right now - do you know what I would give to weigh 131 when NOT pregnant? I'm 5'7" (unless I've shrunk because of my advanced maternal age!) and when I looked my BEST, I weighed 145 (I'm a bigger frame than you - really)!
I'm one of those that don't have a problem with baby weight. I actually lose weight, but I attribute that to all the morning sickness I have the WHOLE pregnancy! Vomiting my way to a slimmer me is the hard way to go, baby.
Anyway, I've blathered on now to say this: You look awesome. You've had 3 babies in 5 years. Things are going to be a little different. Chill Mama, you -look - mahvelous!
I'm with ya, honey! I have been feeling a little extra chubby lately. What was okay at 6 wks. is not okay at 3 mo. I feel like I haven't changed at all! I guess just some progress would make me feel better. At 5'9", I am 150 lbs. I can't believe that you are getting back to 125! I'm shooting for a non-flabby 145 :)
Somehow we girls tend to rest so much of our self-esteem on our looks. Even if no one is putting that pressure on us. We know that our "beauty" is an amazing part of us, but somehow that becomes a burden instead of a gift.
I know that it also is hard to move to a new place when you don't feel "yourself" yet. You want to tell everyone you meet "I'm normally thinner, I just had a baby!". Silly, huh?
But Andie, you are beautiful inside and out. Try to enjoy the "curvier" you while you have it! (That nursing has it's perks :O)
bah! I say bite me to all of you :P
I am 5'1, haven't had any children yet and I weigh Waaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyy more then any of you :P~~
I'm struggling to lose weight as well, you just have to take it one day at time, review each day (what worked what was bad) and try better tomorrow but always remember that sometimes what we want so badly isn't what we need or is best for us.
I am definitely here right now. I weigh what I did when I got pregnant the second time, but I never lost the last five pounds before I did that. So, I'm still not where I want to me. Oscar is 10 months old, and I still have this gut I'm afraid will never go away. Mostly, it doesn't bother me, and when I see pictures from the couple months after he was born, and realize I'm totally out of my maternity clothes, I feel good.
It is frustrating, though, when you have friends who seem to snap back into shape days after giving birth. I have a couple like that and they drive me crazy! (Not because they are trying to, though, hehe.)
I understand...I've lost all of my baby weight, but I still feel gigantic! No matter what, I can't shake my mommy pooch, and for some crazy reason, I can't let that go.
It sucks to be so obsessed. I'm sorry to hear that you are. Hopefully you've just hit a temporary road block, and you'll either lose the rest, or will stop caring soon. One of the two. :)
Oh hunny, I feel you but just wait till Sept when you come visit me. I'm going to be one blubbering, baby fat, jiggling mess at that point. You'll feel great about yourself :)
Yes, I feel you! You know, after every baby my hips finally went back together but not Jack! Now they are just wider apart. I weight the same and everything. Isn't that weird?
BUT, I can tell you that with ALL of them, the last 5-10 pounds WOULD NOT come off until I was totally done nursing. Then it melted right off without me knowing. So no worries. It'll happen. So starve yourself!
LOL!! I meant to write "so DON'T starve yourself," but I have not totally finished my coffee and am still waking up- sorry about that, LOL!
Oh Andrea! Everyday that I look in the mirror I feel like crying. I had my baby 4 months ago (tomorrow) and I'm at 137 pounds but I'm only 5ft 1in. I just had visitors from France and these two women kept saying that they were fat when they were soooo skinny, it made me a little self concious. I still look pregnant and am afraid to take my older kids to school soon because the mothers will be so thrilled that I look the way I do (some of them are not very nice!).
So, you're not alone (even though I think you look amazing)!
Hey there, I have been reading your blog for several days now and have yet to comment. I found you while on one of my famous blog hops and was very intrigued by your stories and while I must admit your hair color is different it is very beautiful on you! The first thing I saw when your page opened was the beauty and love of your family. Sending you lots of luck and just know that you are probably the only person who thinks that losing those pounds is an issue, you look great for three kids. Here is hoping that we can be bloggy buddies, you seem so fun.
Shelly
Oh I hear ya on the storing fat like there is a famine coming. It starts while i'm preggo and it doesn't go away until i'm done nursing. Oh wait, i'm usually preggo by then. OY! It is a hard battle... i don't lose it quick even though like you I eat good and I'm active. And even when i get within pounds of where i think i want to be i still feel all wrong. I think everything fits pack into a different place. Ha!
i'm on the uphill climb right now... i'm sure i'll be feeling mighty fine about myself in a month or two. Uck!
Brittany
Well, first of all Andrea I have to say as always that I think you look fantastic.
Of course I've never had children and I struggle with my weight as it is, so I understand somewhat where you are coming from.
However, I know you can get those 5lb's off if you that's what you really want. I have faith in you!
Although if I lived at your house and ate your delicious cooking I'd be gaining weight, not losing it! :)
I'm not reading all the comments so this has probably already been said but, 131 at 5'8!!!! That is awesome, great, totally in the normal range. I am 5'9 and feel the best in the 140 - 145 range. I'm not telling how much I weigh now because I am 6 months pregnant! So, if I think of you being an inch shorter (and not really that much because technically, I am 5'8 and 3/4) and weighing 15 - 20 lbs less! Wow!
And the whole nursing thing, totally keeps weight on. Been there, going there again!
You're doing great. I don't know why we are so hard on ourselves.
You are gorgeous! I am 5' 8" and 130 and I've NEVER HAD CHILDREN!
:) Haha!
You are doing great, more than great - fabulous! Don't put too much pressure on yourself - your body will adjust when it's ready. But in the meantime, I wouldn't worry - you're still a hot mama!
:)
I know how you feel, Andrea. My baby fat does not start to come off till a year postpartum.My body really has that tendency to hold onto reserves during nursing. Anastasia is 13 months and nursing strong.My weight looks ok on the scales, but I feel like I am carrying too much weight.
I know how you feel Andrea! I am the mother to 3 ages 5, 3, and 11 months. After my 3 year old was born I got smart and joined Weight Watchers. I lost 46 pounds and got rid of the baby weight from the second as well as the 30 pounds left over from my first child. I felt so good about myself. Unfortunately, the pooch in the belly will never leave...un less I can get a tummy tuck one day but I don't think it's in my future. I have noticed now that even when I lose the weight and get back to my pre-baby size my clothes just don't fit the same anymore. Just have get used to the new me I guess.
1) I know the others will say it - but 6lbs to go is pretty fantastic!
2) I know that it's all about wanting to lose the weight.
3) I know the frustration. I never managed to get back to my original weight after Oceana, but I was 2lbs from my target. Now I've still 5lbs off my target, let alone 8lbs to my before Joshua weight, and 10 to my original after-Oceana target. And that's still 15 off my original before-Oceana weight.
Ugh.
This spare tire ain't goin' nowhere.
Blah.
Hang in there. :)
It always takes a while after a baby - Hang in there. I am with you but it is not even baby weight this time.
Ohh - she is soo cute!!!
I am pregnant with my third (hopefully won't be anymore in a week) and I have only been "not pregnant" for a total of 7 months out of the first three years of my marriage! Still, I lost almost all the weight before getting pregnant again after both of my daughters, but I definitely did NOT look the same. This time I'm afraid to lose weight so quickly because I lost my milk with both daughters before they were 5 months old. It was so disappointing. I think I might have to make a conscious effort to eat more this time around and see if it helps. But I'm not excited about purposely staying fat!
You look great! dont worry you will get there soon. one thing i have done since we moved is i took up these dance aerobic class called Zumba, an hour a day four days a week and i got to my goal weight of 125 and i smoothed out the rough edges. and it is sooo much fun to do, you can even get the dvd to do at home.
Well, I don't know if this is true in your case, but I always like to lose the weight after the baby because I feel like/think it makes me look more in control. This is funny psychology, but bear with me here. I have 5 little ones (10 yrs - 18 mos) and I just want to present well at the grocery store or Target or a restaurant or whatever. Strangers will tell me the kids are well-behaved, but I never feel in control of all 5 at once. Someone always needs correcting!! "Don't get in their way, stop touching that, put that back, you are yelling indoors, etc.," and that doesn't include the baby who will randomly scream for something he wants but cannot communicate yet. Sigh...
So, since I theoretically helm this ship, I like to at least look together and feeling slim automatically helps with that. It would be far more ideal to have all the children staying to one side of an aisle and keeping their hands to themselves, but ya know, I'll have to settle for being in control of my body.
So on to the nitty gritty, always give yourself the full year after childbirth to "recover." As others have said, those hips and ribs don't really recover that soon if ever, but around the time nursing decreases your body will naturally stop storing the extra fat. I am 5' 6-almost-7", weighed 125 lbs before last pregnancy, got up to 175 or 180, and back down to 135 lbs one year postpartum. About 132 is probably ideal for me with a little more feminine fullness, but I feel right at my current 127. Your numbers are good now, of course, but you know when you feel best. Just give God and yourself time to get you there!
Lauren
*Hugs* You are beautiful inside & out!
And may I direct your attention to a hottie next to a hotrod wearing a dress she's had since HIGH SCHOOL?
Well I'm a few days late on this one but...I know exactly how you're feeling. Looking in the mirror, or down for that matter, just makes me feel like I'll never reach the goals I have for myself. My problem is the toning part, I feel deflated. I guess we just have to keep our nose the grindstone, eventually we'll get there.
I'd LOVE to be 131 lb! I worked my butt off to get to 165 lb, and I'm 5'6. I'm a health nut, and I work out. I think hormonal weight is the hardest to get rid of. It took me 16 months to get to my pre-pregnancy weight (only to get pregnant again, lol!),... so I hear ya, it's not easy. But you are a healthy weight, so that's at least in your favor. I lost most of my weight in the last 6 months before getting pregnant again, something that helped me personally was increasing lean protein and resisting carbs. And I eat very healthy to begin with, but decreasing the carbs made a huge difference. And of course lots and lots of exercise. I think you look great!!
I don't lose all the weight until after the baby's done nursing!
After the 4th my body is still not "back in place" (2 1/2 yrs.).
I still have a pooch and can look like I'm 4 months pregnant after I eat!! Maybe because my stomach muscles are non existant now?!
Does that make you feel better? ; )
And thanks for the update on Tarrah!
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