Hmmm....I have honestly never heard of someone tipping for having their groceries bagged. So I am no help on that one. I to like using the self check-out, I just think it is a lot quicker. I never really thought about other people's germs on my groceries, but you make a good point...that could be kind of disgusting!!
Good for you for being proactive at the grocery store. I bet a lot of the other women appreciate the extra selection when shopping too :)
I have done the same thing at the commy over here in Germany as well but not only with organic but Gluten free as well. I myself do not have this problem but mother in law does and it seems to be affecting alot more ppl. I was glad that they had no problems with doing it. I also had them start getting Nutro dog food for my dog!!!!
It is lovely that they are willing to help out!!
Typically if I am doing full on grocery shopping I can't go through the self check out because the limit is 45 items. I also am a 2 dollar tipper!!
Hope that you are having a wonderful morning!!
My dad is retired Navy so in my late teens and early 20's I was a dependent and able to go to Hill AFB whenever I got the whim. My dad would always tip $3 and when I would go up on my own I would tip $5. Mind you, I was single and didn't have a family! If I were to hit the commissary nowadays I would most likely slip single bills, not a Lincoln. Now when it comes to being proactive - You so totally rock! I think I might just try the same approach at my local grocery store!
Well I guess I'm stingy too! I also do $2 and that's it. I hate having to tip! We just got self checkout at Patrick AFB (Cocoa Beach, FL) like two months ago, so that has become my BFF!
When were you in AK? We were there from Dec03-jan07.
Anyway, I tip an average of $4, if they are friendly. If they act like they are doing me a favor instead of their JOB that they wanted then I give them $2. I tend to tip the teens more only because I know that they are trying to make their own money, I talk to some of them asking if they like the job and how old they have to be because I know that is were I am sending my boys when they get old enough to work.
I so miss the com. in AK, it was huge compared to the one we have now.
Since the baggers work only for tips I will tip $2 a cart when they load it up. If they are mean and cranky I will only give $1 for it all. I will have to talk to the produce manger. I am there for the ealry bird hours and everyone is friendly at that time before the rush of the day.
From what I've been told, the baggers at the commissary do not get paid by the commissary, so the tip that you give is their "paycheck". I think $2-3 dollars is good, b/c it doesn't take very long to bag and take out groceries. So let's say they bag and take out every 10 minutes (6x an hour), that's a total of $12 or $18 an hour. It's more than an E-3 (my husband) makes an hour. But the amount per hour isn't steady and some days are slow.
Anyway...
I love that you are proactive! Our commisary here carries a nice selection of organic items. Although, I've never seen those cards you were talking about. I'll have to check into that.
I feel you on the small commisary thing. Ours is pretty small too, and selection is very limited. I usually tip $2 for a full load and $1 for smaller. I'm stingy too, but I also don't like the job they do either. I try to use the self checkout as much as possible too.
When they bag and take them out to our car we tip them $2. I think it's great that because you simply asked about organic that they are carrying more of those items. Perhaps I should talk to our manager about getting more of those type items in. Our commissary is small too and I'd like to have more options.
I guess either we are all stingy or all about normal. I usually do $2 too. If I have a TON of stuff (which is rare) I will give $3. And if they just bag and I take them out, I will occasionally put a dollar in the little tip jar.
I learned the hard way at first though. I went shopping by myself a few times right after we were married and never tipped. You normally don't have to and I was too busy thinking about budget and if my husband would like this or that to read the signs that say they only make $ off of tips, not pay. I got some pretty evil looks when I didn't give them anything and so I asked Mike. He set me straight and I felt SO bad!
We don't have a self check out or I would probably use it too. I don't like doing a whole cart though. Something about the guy behind me with just milk and bread breathing down my neck that makes me avoid holding up the line!
Wow! Commissary pricing sounds great. Can I send you my grocery list and $$$ and you buy and send back to me???? Regular stores prices here (CALIF)are outrageous.
Maybe it's just different here (well it is, Northern CA - we're a little wacko), but we don't tip baggers. At least, not as far as I know. They do get paid (and pretty well) because they're part of the unions. The grocery store union...
When I was pregnant with my second and carting a big 2 year old boy around, I started getting them to help me out to my car. I tried tipping them then, but they said it was just part of their job. I was impressed by their honesty - I don't know many teens who would turn away a few dollars being handed to them.
We used to live around the Fort Polk area, and I would tip $5.00, for one I always had alot of stuff and they knew me and my car was always parked a little further away( it`s one of my ticks)and secounds, thats all they get the tip and nothing else. Now we live in Michigan and the Commissary is to far away,so I only go there once a month but I still tip $4.00 to $5.00.
I tip 2 bucks max, unless it's Christmas or I'm feeling extra happy. Often, we only hand over a dollar. I hate tipping, but I hate the self check out more. It always takes twice as long to do it myself, and invariably there is something that didn't scan right or I can't figure out how to add. Plus, with my kids sitting there (or trying to run away), it's just a whole lot easier to go through the check out, bagger or no.
I have to say thanks to all of you who like self checkouts, though; since they put them in, the line for the checkers has gotten a lot shorter!
I'm a self check out girl myself especially when I have Brendan with me!! It's much quicker than waiting on a long line! Good for you on being proactive, maybe I should take a stab at it! I just love your blog by the way!
I have never tipped a grocery bagger. Am I supposed to? I don't shop at a commissary, but it sounds like I would like the prices!
whoa! tip?!?!? i never do that? i don't even think that's ok here!
look at you makin' a difference in the world! i felt that way when i'd suggest books to my old library and they'd order them, then i checked them out first! how exciting for you!
Megan
Whoa. There are self-checkout lanes? I only shop at our commissary once every couple of weeks (my husband is Air Guard not active duty) and I just started doing that recently when I realized how much I could save just by driving the 18 miles to the base. They don't have self-checkout as far as I know.
I try to tip based on the volume of groceries I'm carrying out, when it takes them two carts I'm more likely to tip in the $4-$5 range but usually it's $2-$3.
What really gets me is the fact that I have to remember to carry cash. I'm not a cash carrier, at all so I always end up hitting an ATM and then spending some money in order to have small bills. So maybe I'm not saving as much as I think!
-Oh, and I guess I should introduce myself. I'm Cilla and I linked to your blog from Suzie Sams' blog and have now been reading semi-frequently for a few months. I love it!
I only do self-checkout if I have a few things, but since I shop for two weeks and have the kids with and have always managed to run into problems at the self-checkout LOL I just go through the normal one.
I usually tip about $2 or $3 depending on how much I have.
Luke AFB has a huge commissary, way bigger than the one back at Mountain Home AFB, I like it :)
Depends on how much I have if I will self check out. Also, C has to be on her best behavior to have the priviledge to help self check out. If I am about to lose my sanity, then I let someone bag everything and I always tip $2.00 unless the people are more than helpful then I will add some more to the tip.
We have lots of organics and I love it. Our housing office adds the manager's specials to all the flyers they leave at the house every few weeks.
Amanda
I never use the self-checkout at our commissary because there is always a problem. Produce won't register, it won't read the credit card, some sort of alarm goes off to signal the manager to come and punch some button. I have never NOT had a problem with the self-checkout. So, to the regular lanes I go. I usually just tip $2. I never have all that much food (just me and the hubs for now), and it annoys me every time I have to tip them. I would gladly take my own dang groceries out to the car!! But, I realize they work only for tips, so I don't want to be a jerk. Especially when they are just teens who live on post and need the money.
I do, however, like to know that I am not the only one who is incredibly particular about how my groceries are bagged....
I have been on both sides of the commissary bagging system - I was Active duty military and after we ETS'd, I worked as a bagger. I had some pretty cranky customers, who you could never please no matter how you tried. I personally am very particular about how I like my groceries bagged and how I bagged them for others. They did give us instructions on how to bag, what to bag with what etc. I recieved more in tips then -- (early 1990s) then what you guys are tipping now!! I averaged about $2.00 a cart back then to tip people. And honestly most of the time I averaged about $60 a shift. That was about 6 hours worth of work -- in the frezzing cold or sweltering hot! I had young kids at home that my mom watched a few times a week while I made some pocet change for our family.
Huh? Tip the bagger?
Here's a tip for my grocery bagger: "Don't you EVER put my groceries in to a plastic bag, then put the plastic bag full of stuff in to my reusable bag unless you want my foot in your behind."
I'm like you- I hate having someone else bag my stuff when I'm fully capable of doing it myself. I also LOVE the self check out. Even when it gets me into trouble, lol.
When I have to I tip about $2 too. Maybe $3 if it's an especially HUGE amount I'm buying or if the weather is really horrible out.
That's awesome that they're carrying more healthful foods now at your request! You go girl! :)
I love your passion for healthy eating. I think the steps you are taking to changing your grocery store are awesome. You are my rock star of the week:)
Tip, um, no, don't do that here. Not allowed. But that is because we are paying 14 times what the food originally cost.
Andrea- I don't tip because at our store they ask you not to. I have one sweet old man who almost always catches us and helps us out and I give him one big tip at Christmas. But we don't have a self check out aisle. Publix IS great about carrying anything you request, though. They are always so nice and good to the kids! Free cookies... oh wait, you prob. would frown on that. ;) Maybe you should request they give the kids carrot sticks and organic balloons. I am TOTALLY giving you a hard time. (We are friends now, right, I can give you a hard time?) You pay me back whenever... :)
Well, now i'm not sure if i should feel like a jerk or not, but i never tip when I'm at the commissary. i don't go very often as i'm not actually in the military, but my brother is, and when i'm staying with him I often go. and never once have I actually tipped. i've thought about it, but never done it...
i hate the whole issue of tipping. You never know who to tip and how much and it's just so annoying. It's not that they're not offering a good service, I just don't think it should be up to "personal discretion" how much someone should be getting. I think tipping in general should be done away with and that "tips" should be built into the bill if they want it.
ok now here is one more for you guys: what about when you guys eat out, do you tip then and how much and do you think there is a difference between the two, and what about ALL THE GERMS??
I tip my baggers somewhere between one to four dollars. Only one if it's not that much, or they are being rude. (We have alot of young baggers that can be kind of...lets just say, I'm sure their mothers wouldn't approve.) Four if I have a TON of groceries and they're super friendly. I just think...someday, one of my kids might be bagging. Our self check is only for fifteen items or less. I wish we had it for regular shoppers! I'll have to look into requesting certain items, that'd be great! We live on an annex of Maxwell AFB, and although there's a big commissary 15 minutes away, it'd be great if the little commissary two minutes from my house carried more organic! Our little commissary here is even smaller than the one at Grand Forks (were there 1998-2000).
Well, I'm a little late on this post but oh well :)
The commissaries that we've been to don't have self checkout but you don't have to check the bagger unless they carry it out to your car for you. They do without asking unless you tell them otherwise so we always tell them to just put it back in our cart and we carry it ourselves. I just don't see the point in having to pay someone for bagging and carrying out to my car when I could do it myself.
Everyday I am more and more impressed with your photography skills...
You have to come to the Balloon Fiesta. Its considered one of the most photographed events in the world...
Val en ABQ
*speaking of weddings, maybe when I 'redo' mine you could be my photographer
You are right Eliza the sky is stunning and you are such a smart girl for realizing that! Oh your an absolute doll too. Has anyone told you that lately?
Tarah
I just LOVE 7 month old baby inquisitiveness! And chubby rolls! So cute!
As far as the sky pictures go...
"The heavens declare His glory."
And that's all I need to say about that! :)
Maybe I need to add New Mexico to my list of places I would move when the hub graduates in 9 months. I'm a sucker for a great sunset. And Eliza, I just want to bottle you up, you cute thang! Really, Andrea, your photos need to be published, they are fabulous!
Wow! The sky pictures are just amazing! The first one is my favorite, but the others are equally impressive.
Those pictures are stunning! It makes me miss NM even more. I miss the thunderstorms and the rush of the clouds as they come and go. Your baby girl is so cute, I remember my middle son love to suck on rocks, it was like he was cleaning them!
I see someone is developing quite a "taste" for nature early on...
...and GREAT sky photos! :)
Oh my goodness! Eliza is just too cute!
Love your pics Andrea! You have a very artistic eye for photography.
Wow, the sky pictures re amazing. And Eliza is a cutie as always. :)
PS Thanks for linking to the old post on home birth. It is something I am interested in looking at for the next baby :)
her hair is looking so precious! and talk about a cool sky!!
Megan
That sky is amazing! I'll have to go out west on of these days.
The sunsets are stunning. Is God creative or what!! I'd like to visit NM just to see these sunsets. Blessings to your family.
gorgeous pictures of the sky...and Eliza, of course. :)
WOW! What magnificent pics! They are really breath taking!
Looks like Eliza thought that grass was pretty tasty. She is too sweet, I just love her outfit, but wheres the bow to match?
I'm still drooling over that grilled pizza below. AND this sunset- WOWZERS. Th first sunset pic with motion is SUPER duper. Love it, Andrea!
Isn't the sky in these parts just stunning??? I can count on seeing that beauty every single day and I never get tired of it :)
Eliza is just the cutest little girl, I want to squeeze her :)
Hugs,
Sandra
She's so adorable. That sky is beautiful!
She's such a cutie! And that sky is beautiful! We have pretty sunsets, but nothing like that.
The sunset is beautiful, as is your baby girl!
oh HOW CUTE!!! she is such a sweetie, and I love that her and AJ are so close in "stages"! but the difference between them, he just dives into the ground with his mouth open to get a whole mouth full of grass, where she picks things up & tries to eat them! and the sky, BEAUTIFUL!
your pics are amazing I wish she sky looked like that here. And boy is she a cute baby girl
Adorable babies and soul tingling skies--what a great post!
How I wish I had you here to show my how to do this with my camera, Andrea. You are amazing.
And I can't believe that baby is sitting up like that - my word, Avery is only two months behind her and I keep forgetting, in a couple of months she'll be doing this. How Cute!!
Beautiful pictures! That sky is amazing!
What kind of camera do you have?
OMG!!! Eliza is sooooo beautiful!!! I just love the pics of the sky!! stunning is right!
That sky is absolutely beautiful...and still, not as beautiful as your baby :)
Wow what a stunning sunset! Beautifully captured.
Eliza is gorgeous as always!
All your photos are beautiful.
Very cute! And I love the pictures of the sunset.
Oh my word, those arms and legs! I totally want to pinch them! I miss those baby rolls so much.
The sky looks amazing!
Beautiful! The baby and the sky.
I love when they finally get over the stage where they put everything in their mouths, but that means they are also over a lot of other really cute things.
Gorgeous photos!! And that sunset ain't so bad eaither... :)
Eliza must be a reader. How else has she evolved such an expansive vocabulary?
Happy POW!
Can Eliza come over and teach my 17-month-old how to talk? Because he only knows like 3 words! :)
Those pictures are so adorable, and man! That was a stunning sky!
Hey Andie,
Your sunset pictures are phenomenal, especially the last one. I've discovered a growing passion for scenic photography. I am not by any means spectacular, but I take such pleasure in capturing the defining moments of beauty God grants us each day.
As always its great to see pictures or the kids as well:)
Ohhhh that looks yummy!!
My husband only buys what's on the list, too. They just don't know how to shop! (or maybe they do...)
I'd love to try that, could you post the recipe you used for the dough and maybe some helpful hints!! Thanks!!!
Okay, so where's the dough recipe? And did you make your own pesto? Looks YUM!! Hard to burn is a BIG bonus in my book.
That looks so yummy! I may have to try that :)
And as for the husband shopping...that is SO NOT my experience!! My husband comes home with what is one the list and about $50 worth of miscellaneous snacks. I come home with just what is on the list. Maybe we are just role reversed :)
Will you share your dough recipe? I have that on my list for this weeks recipes to try, but I only have a rising dough recipe. Good to know it works well!
And Mike is totally opposite. I stray from the list a little, he strays... well, let's just say I rarely send him alone :) We are on a major budget here at the moment.
Your belly shot post actually makes me miss being pregnant. I loved the excitement and anticipation of it. It is great that he is here too and I can enjoy wearing normal clothes again!
Oh boy, that's making me super hungry! Maybe we'll try that tonight :)
Your baby belly made me smile. I just posted an updated picture of mine and we look about the same size 1 year removed, haha.
That pizza looks delcious! Anything that has pesto on it I'm a sucker for!
Oh- how awesome! I have been wanting to do this also... but we don't have a grill! Crazy! We live in Tx and don't own a grill ( I think thats against the law!) We are looking for one though.
Oh, and I so need the dough recipe! I had a rcipe about 10 years ago that did not need to rise, but it is long gone and I haven't been able to find another. So please share!
Alicia
Did you win the base bakeoff? The cookies looked great!
Looks incredible! I should warn you that every time you post pics of food, I will ask you for the recipe. Without further ado, Andrea - may we please have this recipe?
you da bomb, andrea! (did i just type that phrase?? i must really mean it!)
and, say what??! no recipe! i'm hangin' here! this sounds so easy and cheap- PLEASE pass that one on...
Megan
Oh, my...I love reading your blog. Not only do I enjoy your posts, but the food makes my mouth water! That looks wonderful - where, oh where, is the recipe? : )
I think you could write recipes for a magazine and photograph them too!
That looks so yummy!
I've been wanting to do grilled pizza for awhile now but haven't worked up the guts to do it yet. I think you just talked me into it! It looks delicious.
Tarah
What a cool idea! That would make a good recipe to post on Tuesday...hint hint...
Looks absolutely delicious!!!!
That looks great. I've really been wanting to start cooking more at home This definitely inspires me to dive into it.
Thank you.
Yummy! I haven't had pizza in a while.
I've looked at your recent posts and I just love all the pics, Andrea. You have an absolutely lovely family.
Eliza is more beautiful everyday and so are Eve and Judah (handsome, that is).
Could I call you sometime this week and catch up? It seems like we haven't talked or emailed in so long. I miss our conversations.
Hugs,
Eden
Just to let you know, I have a little shout-out to on on my blog.
Alicia
as soon as I saw that pizza, i was hungry girl and I just ate breakfast. it looks totally yummy. i will have to give it a try sometime.
what a cute baby bump pic by the way!
We do pizza on the grill alot too. I love it. I do Digarno though and it is usually done on a tired Friday night...but we do however love grilling! Your pizza looks great byt he way.
If I were a millionaire, you would be my personal chef. Sigh. My mouth is watering.
Oh yum! That looks so good. Too bad I don't actually know how to use our grill. =)
That looks good and healthy. Please give us the recipe!!
Sarah
Eliza is just stinkin' cute in those cut offs! What an adorable little one you have on your hands. I love all the head bands that you have for her too.
I just love baby chub. Will is starting to get some in his arms, I could just eat it up!
Ahhh! She is too cute! I'm jealous that you can put bows in her hair. I just bought some for Chloe but she's not got enough hair yet. :(
She is just ridiculously cute!
Look at that cute little thing!! She melts my heart and so makes me want another baby!!
Good gravy - that girl is SO stankin' cute!
Seriously - how is there anything more fabulous than Eliza and her cut-offs? Love it!
Very, very, very cute! :)
OMGosh! How cute! I have got to make some cut offs for my Beast! Why didn't I ever think of that???
SO cute!
Adorable! That whole outfit is cute, I love the shirt.
is there a way to gently squeeze a baby through a computer screen?
Megan
SO, SO CUTE!!
Those thighs are nibble-worthy!
It makes me want to squeeze and kiss her...she is so sweet. I love the red too.
She is so cute I can't stand it! I love baby chubbiness so much :) Thank you for sharing, Andrea!!
Oh my gosh, how adorable!!!!!!
She looks like a baby model in that outfit!
How stinking cute is she! I love the cut offs.
Tarah
When I look at her I see a lot of Eve but in the last picture she looks like Judah to me.
She is so adorable!! Just look at those rolls!!
There is just nothing sweeter than chubby little baby legs. Love it!
This one is "me" also:
Would I do anything different at my wedding? Probably not....everything was perfect and I was so very happy.
I would've probably done alot different. The dress is at the top of that list. Like you, it was just a little too overstated...I would've preferred more simple. Although I loved my colors, there just wasn't enough of it. And I would've hired a photographer instead of going the cheap way and having a friend do that.
I could speak volumes here! But the biggest thing I wish I could have changed would have been the photographer. We skimped and it showed. I am kicking myself profusely to this day! Shadows everywhere and not a creative bone in this man's body. :(
Oh well, in the end I got my best friend and after ten years I love him even more. That's the important stuff!
I would have insisted that my vocalists do a run through in the rehearsal. I wanted them to, but somehow it didn't happen and I didn't want to come across as too controlling. They totally messed up and it was dreadful, which is a shame because it was a beautiful and meaningful song to us. It was the only thing I would have changed.
Oh, I think about this all the time! We only had four weeks to plan and everything worked together really well but there are a couple of things that I would have done so differently! I'd have chosen a better photographer...never try to save money here, it totally shows. Also, a lady I worked with at the time gave me a gift certificate to her hair stylist and made an appt for the day of the wedding to get my hair done. I shouldn't have done that. I should have gone to my hair guy who knew me and knew what I liked. I showed up at the church with ugly hair and crying because the lady hurt my feelings. Argh.
Isn't it funny that so many years later, we still think on these things? I bet you our sweet husbands haven't given it a thought!
Actually, no. I wouldn't change a thing. We got married at the courthouse - just the 2 of us. The clerk who married us also served as photographer and he took pictures with a disposable camera.
Afterward, we went to our favorite bar and had cheap champagne and cheese fries. Aside from the births of my children, it was the highlight of my life. I loved every second of it.
Andrea,
I do still think about our wedding, and I don't really talk about it, because I've always sort of prided myself on not being the kind of girl who cared. So thanks for asking =).
The biggest thing I would change: I'd buy an under-skirt for my dress. My grandmother made my dress from a magazine picture I gave her, bless her heart, and I loved it, except that the skirt wasn't nearly as full as I wanted it to be. I didn't know until later that most wedding dress skirts are only that full because of the under-skirt. I still regret that every time I look at the pictures.
I also wish my brother-in-law had already known his now-wife when we got married, because she takes *beautiful* photographs, and I'd rather have had her than our photographer.
I'd have had the women who stood up with me just wear their nicest dress, rather than making them wear brides-maids dresses--or gotten different, less brides-maidy brides-maids dresses.
I picked the church building where we were married solely on aesthetic lines (beautiful vaulted wood ceilings, beautiful stained glass windows in the front, center aisle) but we had never set foot in it before the wedding and we haven't set foot in it since. If I had it to do over again, I might have a smaller wedding so that we could have had it at my parents' house, outside (they live on five lovely, wooded acres). It would just be nice to have the *place* commemorated in the pictures be as dear to us as the people.
Things I'm glad we did:
--Used the traditional 1920 Book of Common Prayer wedding vows, and prohibited the pastor from giving a sermon =).
--I wore the same veil that my mother and her mother had worn at their weddings, and the same tiara that my mother, and her mother, and her mother had worn at their weddings, which my great-grandmother (or great-great-grandmother, I'm a little hazy at this point) made by hand.
--Had my mother and my great-aunt play a violin duet of my favorite hymn during the ceremony.
--Hired a live (and good!) pianist for the ceremony.
--Took Communion together during the ceremony.
--Hired a real DJ for the reception rather than using a friend.
--More or less ignored most of the guests and *danced* for most of the reception. The majority of the guests were our parents' friends--see remark about having a smaller wedding above--and we were glad to have them there. But I have always wanted to dance my feet off at my reception and have a really good time, so I'm glad I got to.
Lucy
I was pregnant on our wedding day, early along so I wasn't showing. We had the ceremony and reception at a local greenhouse. My mom did everything for me - I was so beyond sick being preg with Sylas, I had a PIC line IV and had to hook up to fluids several times a day at home. I was completely exhausted and too drained to plan a thing. Daisies everywhere (my fave flower) and a simply elegant dress. We opted for the lavish honeymoon over a lavish wedding. I don't think I would have changed a thing...Maybe the part where I tried to shove the ring on Chris's wrong finger AND wrong hand. Doh!
Um yeah, I would have done just about everything differently. I really didn't plan my wedding- my Mother did. She even chose my dress. It was a pretty dress but not anything I would have chosen for myself had I really searched more. (I think it was the second one I tried on and that was that)
My biggest regret is that J and I didn't really have time together at all that day. We didn't even have that "first moment" where we saw each other. He saw me in my dress before the ceremony for pictures and it was all rushed and hectic. And it was his first time home in a year (since enlisting in the military) so everyone on earth wanted a piece of him and I felt like OUR relationship was a low priority that night. It was all about his family.
To this day I wish we had done something smaller- just immediate family and closest friends- at a bed and breakfast somewhere. Maybe someday we'll be able to renew our vows in that fashion. That would be wonderful!
Hmm, tough question. At the time I did not regret anything that we did... but looking back I would probably do everything differently.
First off - would be to not get married. Well, not never, just I wish we would have waited. We found out that Marc was going to be deployed during our original date and instead of waiting till he got back, we went ahead and did the justice of the peace thing.
I am glad we did that as I didn't have to keep living in the barracks while he was gone for 6 months. But... I have this great dress that I have never worn, my Dad didn't get to walk me down the isle and I never had that first dance with my husband.
Instead, we went to the JOP with my roommate (WHO WORE WHITE! If you can believe it!) I had on some icky white suite thing, I didn't like my hair (or my shoes) We went out to dinner afterwards and ordered wine, which was nasty (we thought we were cool!) then went to Wal-Mart, came back to my barracks room and fell asleep. Yep - very eventful night.
The worse part - we have one, yep 1, slightly out of focus picture. We had a video, but we taped over most of it with a trip to Sea World.
But, I did marry the most awesome guy in the world! And here we are 13 1/2(!) years later and we have yet to do anything the "conventional" way.
We have talked about having a "real" wedding someday - preferably a Disney wedding, but somehow, I just don't think we will ever get around to it. Maybe for our 25th or something - when I am too old to care how fat I look :)
Alicia
Mike and I always say, "When we get married again..." and usually we fill in the blank with we would get a different photographer. I LOVE photography and have some specific photographs in mind that I still want (yes, two years later). We have even considered redoing them... when I fit back in my dress that is. (Post nursing, it might work. But don't rush me on that one.) I just wanted more candid shots that really captured the feeling of the day and not just the formals. My favorite photographs are ones that others took and just sent to me.
I would have also gotten pictures with just my dad, mom, and all my sisters (in-laws included), also one's with just each set of grandparents. Didn't get any of those and wish we had.
Other than that, really, it was a wonderful day.
Oh and for Mike, he would choose to NOT have a terrible cold on the wedding day. Poor guy!
-Amber
Oh and I would have worn my hair down and slightly curly with maybe a flower tucked up in it. My hairstyle was too stiff for me.
And Mike wouldn't have gotten so short of a hair cut.
Oh, our wedding was great, but I think I would have eloped. The stress of all the wedding what nots was overwhelming and I would rather have been on a beach or something. If not that, definitely a better photographer. Though I still don't know who I would choose in town. But all-in-all, I'm very happy with my wedding day. And my wedding night, now I wouldn't change a single thing about that:) Is that TMI?
Well, this sounds like a PERFECT excuse to renew your vows!! =)
As far as my wedding goes...I would've finished things a little sooner than a few hours before the wedding! But I'm a procrastinator (sp?) at heart and I thrive under pressure...
That and maybe not have "I shot the sheriff" playing 50x on repeat while we were getting ready. haaha!
i think all the same things- i think our wedding was just right for us then, but, man, i am waaaaay more creative and sure of myself now- marriage does that for me- so now i have so many ideas for how our wedding could have been so much better...but of course, i'm not getting married now, so i'm just thankful for the fact that marriage has grown us so much...
Megan
I feel just like Megan - we did the best we knew then, but I am so much more creative and aware of who I am now.
I sooooo wish I had known Carrie then and had her take the pictures! Our pics are BORING. Oh well!
Our tenth is only 3 years away - maybe we could renew our vows then!
I would definitely do things differently.
I would have a smaller more intimate wedding rather than inviting everyone in the world.
I would wear my hair down because that is what my husband likes best.
A different photographer! For sure.
A videographer.
A florist who provides what she says she will provide.
Probably a different bridesmaid color, something classier than bright pink, but then again, maybe not!
Maybe a different dress, at least, I would have looked around more.
But, the biggest thing would be the photographer and secondly the number of invited guests.
And here I thought I was the only person in the universe who ever felt that way. I actually feel guilty sometimes for it! I do understand. Hindsight IS twenty- twenty. I would have done things differently as well in a few areas. The one thing I wouldn't change was our photographer. He was wonderful and we had such a great time with him! He was creative and brought out so many different things in our wedding. I'll have to do another wedding pictures post. It's been a good two years! Thanks for posting about this. I don't feel so badly anymore! :-)
There isn't much that I would change about my wedding but then again I hardly planned any of it (we were only engaged for 4 months and gone for 3 1/2 of those 4 months) So we planned the big stuff that we cared about and left the rest to our mom & my sister. I didn't stress over anything. Some stuff went wrong with the sound system at the reception but besides that it was perfect.
Our wedding was black & white Seth and I both wore white (I'm so glad I talked him into it, it's looked awesome and was so pure!) and the flowers were white then everyone else was in black. It was stunning. I loved it. The fact that I wanted a black & white wedding since I was 10 (I went to a wedding that was like that and loved it) and actually did it and it looked cool made me so happy.
Oh our photographer was horrendous. Picture that my volleyball coach took were better than theres. I would have spent the money and gotten one that knew what they were doing. I actually just went through our wedding pictures b/c I'm wanting to blow some up but I couldn't find any that I liked enough. Sad, very sad.
Tarah
So, I'm behind, but I wanted to share that my colors were red, yellow, and orange, too!
And, although I'm still head over heals for my dress, I don't love the necklace I wore, or how I had my hair done. At least I'm still happy with my choice of groom!
I loved my wedding...everything about it. It was small, simple yet elegant and totally stress free. It was heaven. It wasn't a stuffy, uptight, everyone stressed out type of wedding at all.
But I do love the 2nd dress you posted. I may have looked elsewhere for my dress if I knew that there were some other options...
I have thought that before for sure, even though we only got married 4 years ago there are a lot of things I would do differently. In fact, the other day, just for fun, lol... I not only picked out a new wedding dress but also bridesmaid dresses, centerpieces, tuxes, flowers, etc. online...it was so much fun! Gave me a thrill to put together things that are more "me" (as we were on a tight budget and major time constraints when we got married. Not to mention the fact I involved my MIL WAY too much!)
I hope B and I have a son as adorable as yours!
He is so adorable. I can see why you'd take the ride with him :)
And a very cute little boy at that! Don't fret over pink cake...Blake is 13, and definitely all boy, loves the color pink! Drives his daddy crazy, but Blake just lets it roll of his back and says real men love pink...I Think he seen it on a tshirt a few years back and it just stuck! LOL!
He seems like such a good natured kid, with just the right amount of toddler spunk! ;) As for the love of pink, it doesn't sound so bad...it could be a lot worse I guess!
Those pictures are so good. He is adorable and I love his name.
Looks like he's surviving pretty well as the only boy!
he is so adorable! Boys are awesome aren't they! :)
brittany
What wonderful pics of Judah!! Your really are an amazing photographer! Have you started your class up that you mentioned you were going to take?
He will definitely know how to treat a lady with all the girls around him.
What a sweet post, it's funny he reminds me so much of Nicholas. Boys are just so different to girls, all I can say is that it's been an adventure LOL
He sounds aLOT like my Little King...
You are a very talented photographer! And your 2 youngest look a LOT alike (I haven't been reading long, so I haven't seen many pics of your oldest). Wonderful post...I'm excited to see my little boy's personality develop...they're SO different from girls!
oh boys. boys oh boys. sigh. that seems to say it all sometimes!
enjoy the ride he takes you on for the years to come...
I love his little hands and fingernails in teh first picture, and the white in the second, but they're all really beautiful... love the bubble wrap and the flowers. :) He is so sweet and precious. (I know, i know... "except when he's not.") :)
I love my little boy too.
Oh, he is so adorable Andrea and the pictures and post make me smile ~ he sounds so very much like my Mason!! He is ALL boy and does some of the very things you wrote about! Cherish these days, they go way too fast as you know. Many blessings, friend!
He is so two and so terribly perfect! Your photos are amazing - as always!
You have the cutest kids! (besides mine, of course) heehee.
My heart is starting to ache to have a boy at home. Every time I hear you talk about Judah it's only makes that ache throb that much more. What a sweet little man you have!
Tarah
oh, see, i thought you were going to say you were having issues with judah wanting PINK frosting :) too funny. and it looks amazing! amazing!
Megan
Andrea, what are you doing to me with these cakes that I can't taste? It is beautiful - strawberries and blackberries. Oh, I want to be a kid again and live with you, okay?
mmmm, yummy!
Mmmm - yummy! I just got done making homemade chocolate cupcakes with cream cheese frosting for Kaitie and Mandy's birthday!
Oh, and I so totally stole your idea! We had dessert for dinner Sunday night! I'll post about it tomorrow :) Chocolate waffles! Oh man - I just realized we had dessert and breakfast for dinner.. how cool is that?
Alicia
yummy! i am starting to yearn for a trip west. dessert for dinner...crazy! crazy awesome!
I want pink cake! I'll be right over :)
That looks scrumptious! Enjoy it :)
Ohhh pink is my signature color!
Yummmmy=))
hmm... that's weird about your pictures not fitting. although, i kind of wonder, how did you get them bigger in the first place? or was it an accident... i have wanted mine to be bigger for awhile, but am not sure how.
your pink cake looks lovely btw :) such a pretty shade!
Thanks Andrea, pink is my favorite color LOL
Now I'm in the mood for cake...dagnabit LOL
the cake looks so...yummy! your family is definitely lucky to have you making these great looking desserts!
exercise of the week is on a hiatus with our move...but it sounds like you are working out hard on your own-you go!
Yum yum! What flavor was it? It looks delicious, and so summery with the berries on top!
My personal favorite pink cake is Strawberry Daiquiri cake...
Stellar pictures of both your kids!
Miller likes pink too...its just a phase..hopefully.
Love the flashback post, and the cake looks delish. Nice frosting choice, Judah!
She is absolutely gorgeous! I hope my babies (someday!) are as beautiful as yours!!!
Such a beautiful girl! I love how you create such a beautiful picture of her, not just with your camera, but with your words too. I feel like I know her. Motherhood is wonderful and yours must be filled with joy with that little girl!
What a doll!
Please tell me that she is not 7 months old for it means that my Jericho is (almost, on Sunday) 11 months old!
Where did you get that adorable bow? I think Jericho might need one of those. Are you as obsessed with putting things on or in your daughters hair as I am? It's just too cute when they have bows!
Tarah
Eliza is pure sunshine; what an angel! Oh they grow too fast. Why won't they just stop? Blessings!
These pictures are great Andrea, she is such a doll baby!!
Super super adorable! I can not believe it's been 7 months already.
brittany
She is just precious! I love the bow on her head...she looks just like a little doll!
Happy 7 month birthday pretty girl!
She's so cute :) And I love that bow!!
What a cutie! She looks great in purple :)
It is going WAY to fast! My little dumpling is almost 8 1/2 months! AACK!
And, my girls turned 10 today! Hmmm... time to have another one? LOL! Ok, maybe not just yet, but hmmmmm...
Alicia
she's precious! time does fly doesn't it? i just had my third on may 1st and am in no hurry for him to grow up. you have a beautiful family.
She is stunning!
She is just so pretty! I absolutely love her facial expression in that second picture! Happy 7 months Eliza!
Love your blog look.
Is it new?
Fabulous photos.
She. is. too. cute.
Happy 7 months!!!
and Happy POW!!!
She is so beautiful, Andrea! Absolutely gorgeous. I miss the gummy smile :(
And I agree....why rush things when we know things will happen eventually? Let them stay precious babies as long as they feel necessary :)
Happy 7 months, Eliza! You are one gorgeous, happy, sweet baby.
Happy POW! Eliza is absolutely precious. You have captured her perfectly both in picture and description!
Wow! These pictures are absolutely amazing! I have to know what kind of camera you have so I can add it to my neverending list of things I want but probably can't afford. Oh, and your baby is really cute too. :)
Great pictures! She is adorable. I love the hair bow, mine won't leave anything alone so she's never had one.
I love the gummy look too they are so cute like that. She is just a doll and i cannot believe she is 7 months old...wow....
Beautiful pictures of a beautiful girl! Enjoy every precious minute, you're right it passes all too quickly!!
I have the same question as Jen, what kind of camera do you have - the pictures are amazing. I'm sure you had something to do with it too. She is such a cutie!
It's obvious that you've heard it before - but she is adorable!
She's beautiful. I love her hair! Happy 7 months. It does go quickly. I have a 9 year old and a 6 year old and my son will be 9 months in a week. Thankfully he's slow to reach some of those milestones too ;).
¡¡¡Feliz Cumpleaños Preciosa!!!
Val en ABQ
These pictures are beautiful! What a sweetie (even in the last one! tee hee!)
Happy 7 months to your beautiful baby girl! : )
What an adorable baby girl! The pictures are just precious.
The photos are gorgeous!! The bow is awesome - I missed having bows for Lex when I took photos! But I did put him in a tutu once . . .
Love her squishy baby rolls and the fact that she's a bow head makes you good people in my book!
Is her hair auburn? Such a gorgeous color.
Your sweet little girl is beautiful~ Adore the bow in her hair. I'm still trying to get away with it for my 22 month old. She's fighting me on it. But I'm trying. The pictures you took are lovely.
oh my gosh....7 months already??? I can't believe how the time has flown by! It just floors me! You have such a sweet and adorable daughter there. All of your children are beautiful :)
So cute! We have a little girl that is about to turn six months old and has brought an amazing amount of joy to our lives as well. There is just something about sweet little girls!
Congrats!
So cute and I love the bow!
Oh she's just gorgeous.
Now I want a girl next.
Enjoy every second they grow up way too fast don't they?
What a gorgeous baby girl. Happy POW!
Amazing pictures! What kind of camera do you use? Of course, the adorable little girl in them is what really makes them great, lol.
I just love the shot of her crying! How adorable is she?
Happy POW to you and your beautiful baby girl!
oh my goodness she is sooo beautiful :) of course the fact that her mama is an amazing photographer doesn't have anything to do with anything... seriously, these pictures are awesome!
ps are you using a 50mm f1.8? would you let me know which one you are if it isn't? I'm seriously thinking i need 1.8... i'm a bokeh junkie, yah that's what i am :)
Too too cute!
Ohhhh!! I just did a post about this....the fleeting-ness of babyhood!!
Eliza is beautiful.
And gobbly.
(that is going to make so much more sense if you read my post. :) Gobbly is a good thing, I promise!)
Gorgeous! Hang on tight to that baby time and enjoy every moment.
When oh when will we see her face in magazines (pics taken by you of course)?!? She is just too cute for her own good!
Andrea, I am one of Kim's friends and I know exactly how you feel. This post brought tears to my eyes and made me think of my best friend Karen who I miss dearly. She's the one to move around and now she's settled but I am far away from her. But thank the Lord for planes, trains, cars and e-mail and phones. Hang in there! We try to visit twice a year and it's always so sad at the end of the visit! But we always look forward to next time!
I can understand...
Pensando en ti...
Val in ABQ
I haven't been reading your blog for very long, so maybe at some point you posted about this. But I, for one, would be very interested in your "life story"...how you and your husband met, where all you've been, etc. I'm always fascinated to hear about that stuff :)
Been there 10 years ago and did it....it killed me to leave my dear friend Cindy. As much as I loved her we needed to go....we see each other every year though..I go there and she comes here. Thank God for transportation......hugs to you Andrea....things will get better sweetie....the cycles of friendship changes and you will meet some more great wonderful friends.
Nothing makes up for good friends to share life with, and hard weeks are--well, hard! I'm sorry.
Lucy
I'm sorry you are sad Andrea. I understand how you feel. I actually cried a few weeks ago for a long time just because I miss my friends so much. I don't have anyone here like the friends I left at home and I so miss that. I love the life I have for the most part, but leaving friends and family has to be the hardest part of it. I hope you feel better soon and get to visit them soon!
We aren't in the military but we have managed to move every 3 years of our married life, which has only been three different states total. I keep telling myself, the grass is always greener and comparison is the thief of joy. Always easier to tell myself than to believe!
Aw...you know that I have gone through the same thing, so I feel your pain.
((HUGS))
I can't even pretend to imagine how you feel, but I can pray for you...and that my friend, you can count on!!
Andrea,
I am Kim's aunt Louise and I truly enjoy reading your blog. Your message today touched my heart but I want you to know that friendships can continue even when we do not live close to each other. My dearest friend Cindy lives in Atlanta (I'm in Jacksonville) and we have been friends for 55 years and get together several times a year for a visit or vacation. So...hang in there, have faith and look forward to many years of friendships.
Ah, your heart is so precious, Andrea. I just love you. Totally wish I was your neighbor but you already know that and would you stop getting me in trouble in photography class already! (Okay, so no one who reads this will no what in the world I am talking about, but you do:)
It would seem distance is one of those things that we struggle with too. Every time a we get really strong bonds with a family, they up and move. (Not every time but it would seem too frequently none the less.)
But you are such a precious girl and you are bound to make dear friends wherever you go. And until then you have your internet and phone friends cheering you on and sending you prayers of encouragement.
love you,
K
I'm sorry to hear that you're sad. It must be so hard to have to constantly say goodbye to people you love!
My heart aches for my best friend, who lives states away, too. I've had a hard time fitting in to the town that I live in (I haven't really met anyone I can be "real" with), so I miss the people I've connected with in the past.
We're obviously not in your same situation, but I empathize with you. ((Hugs!))
I am so sorry for your hurt and I completely understand it. It's hard when we can't be close to our "kindred spirits". If you were here I'd give you a big, fat, bone-crushing hug. But this'll have to do. ((((hugs)))) Hang in there girlie.
It's funny - I miss my friends normally, but knowing that they are going through something momentous makes it worse. I mean, when you moved to NM, I missed you more - and how long has it been since we've even lived in the same state? I think our hearts just know that when our friends are going through something - good or bad - we are supposed to be able to walk though it with them.
all so true- i think i'll just leave it at, "i understand".
Megan
I feel this way so many times I can't count. I esp miss our last duty station - where we lived literally feet away from the coolest neighbors ever. Sara and I shared creativity, sewing, laughs, coffee, antiquing; it was awesome. and her husband and mine got along famously. AND they were like the aunt and uncle evyn never had. They were simply awesome, and our time next door to them was equally awesome. Even harder to take? A good friend of mine (lacey) from several years earlier got stationed at Fort Lewis just two weeks before we had to move. AND THEN she moved into my house - and she and sara picked up where sara and I left off. I felt so happy for both of them, but so jealous at the same time. I had wanted to live near Lacey again for so long and when we finally were stationed together WE MOVED! AND SHE GOT MY FRIEND SARA! AND THEY WENT ON A ROAD TRIP TO MY FAVORITE PLACE IN THE COUNTRY - NAPA VALLEY! I literally cried when I saw them blog about it...
So, I totally, completely, understand how you feel.
And btw, i don't know where in NC your friend moved, but if you ever visit her and she lives within a couple hours of me, we should FINALLY meet up!
pls excuse the all caps but sometimes the emotions call for it.
I have been friends with Tarrah for over 20 years now and your blog touched me so much it made me cry and long for her friendship also. They are such an amazing couple. I so feel your pain of being away.
Just wanted you to know that I really enjoy reading your blog. You have a way with words that makes me feel like I was actually there. Also, thank you for being such a great friend for Tarrah, I know you mean the world to her and she misses you tons also.
Take care.
my Daddy did that with me and my 2 sisters as well.
Hugs and Blessings. Mike Golch said that.
Aww, that is so sweet. It is so obvious how smitten you are with your husband, I love it. My heart melts too when I would watch my husband with our daughter. It does seem a little off to watch a manly man being so sensitive, but it's a wonderful surprise.
Beautiful picture, Andrea!! Love the green bokeh. Sweet post too, you guys are so cute.
How did dinner go?
One word: ADORABLE!
You are so lucky!
hey there! my Dad had 4 girls and then a boy came along, and he is so great with all of us too:) and now, he has 5 grandsons & no grandaughters (yet...)! I really just stopped by to say hi, because it's been a while! love your posts! copy your recipes all the time...when I'm feeling better I'm gonna try the cream puffs, they look AWESOME! hope you have a magnificent day!
I'm curious if we ever had a little girl what kind of interaction my big tough marine would have with her.
Your girls are lucky to have such a great dad!
Aww, you guys are the CUTEST. Daddy-daughter interactions, nothing like it. That's why "Father of the Bride" has a soft place in every daddy's girl's heart. :)
That's a beautiful photo, and my children love to do that with their daddy too. I've done it with Lex, but WOW it's scary for me!!
so sweet. and, i have all the same feelings, for sure. we have daddy-daughter love x3 in this house...
Megan
what a gorgeous picture!! i love how those sweet, pudgy baby hands are restly so gently on top of daddy's head. super sweet!
Little girls and their daddys are just special. We have lots of pictures just like that one. Just makes you get gooey all over, huh?
I love that picture!!! So cute (both of them :) )
Alicia
What a sweet post! He seems like a great guy!
Daddy's & there daughters it's is such a gift to watch them interact together, especially when you know the daddy adores his daughter. There is nothing quite like it.
Tarah
Now that's some heart melting sugah, right there. Doesn't watching your man be a daddy make you fall in love all over again? every. single. time.
Well I have eaten your cookies and they are winning material...we loved them. You need to do this and I cant wait to hear about it.
I would feel the exact same way. Who wants to know what people really think? But Ive made your cookies and they ROCK. So I say go for it. And think of the poor chocolate-less troops, they need your cookies Andrea, they need them.
you're a shoe-in! bake 'em andrea, bake 'em! and think of how happy you're gonna make the troops with that chocolate-y goodness!
Good Luck - just from the photo they look like winners!
Enter them Andrea! Everything you make always looks delicious and I'm sure it tastes even better than it looks.
Good luck!
You have to do it Andrea!
Go For It Girl!! Who cares what they think. Your husband thinks they're a winner and that's really the only person that matters! Right? Besides, the troops need your cookies! Do it for your country! (insert patriotic music here)
"Bake-offs" are usually less intense than the judging at like a fair or something - usually it's more about what people DO like than what they DON'T like about the entries. Let's hope, right? Totally do it - your cookies are great!
Well, I made your recipe and the first dozen were gone before the last batch was out of the oven. I was also able to bribe my oldest to get all his school work done in record time by setting one of them in front of him on the table. I say go for it!
I say go for it! You may even win.
I say go for it, but if it was me, I would be hesitating too LOL You and I are a lot alike, it's actually scary LOL
How about you have a contest and send some to one of US? :) I want the recipe! What's your secret? I would be TOTALLY stressed about this, too. but do it! I bet you win!
Those cookies look super yummy! You should definitely do the contest!
I am sure the troops would love anything they can get there hands on and homemade, well enough said. There is nothing like homemade!
go for it!
Oh, yum. They look delicious! I would be the same way, though. I think it's great 2 dozen will go to deployed members--you KNOW they will love them (homemade cookies when I was in Iraq were the BEST!!) and they will appreciate them regardless. I say do it and you'll be a winner in the deployers eyes :) Let us know what you decide!
I would feel that way too, but you should go for it! My new motto is never let fear hold you back. I have let fear control my life for far too long!
Although I haven't personally had your cookies- I say life's too short. . . Go for it!
And on that note, I think you should host some more bloggy giveaways with cookies as the main prize so some of us can personally experience what those in the know are saying about your cookies ( :
Good Luck and hope you win.
Do it!! What's the worst that can happen?? Even if you don't win, there are some troops over there who would LOOOVVVEE homemade cookies!
Yes, I think it's a must and I can tell from the picture that they would do very well in a bake-off, for sure!!! Mmmmmmm, I'm drooling right here, all over my keyboard :-)
I agree, these cookies are very yummy. I've made them 3 times already. My husband and boys love them.
oooh do it do it! its your patriotic duty. : )
I think you should do it...you'd win first prize for sure! If they tast HALF has good as the way they look in that photo, the judges will be asking you if you take orders for your baking! :)
BUT, if you decide you don't want to, you could always just bake some and send them to deployed troops on your own...
Labels: Recipe
It seals the deal, I love you Andrea! But not just for your recipes, I promise:)
They really do look wonderful. I need to try them.
Oh my goodness. Thank you.
Can't I just use Hershey's chocolate ice cream syrup instead of the fancy chocolate sauce?
J/K Just wanted to see if I could make you faint:)
Looks great and thanks for taking the time to write up the recipe.
ooo, that looks like a fun, "we're home on a saturday in winter" kind of thing...but i may not wait until winter to make them...
Megan
I would buy a pastry bag just so I could pipe the pc into these beauties! The last time I made cream puffs, I had to make them w/out the benefit of a mixer--my arm was so sore! Yours look so delicious!
oh yum!Maybe you could use these as the prize in your next contest & rig it so I win ! :-)
This post made my mouth water. Mmm...Cream Puffs!
Since baking is one of my cure-alls for stress (it's not been working lately though), I think I'll make about, uh... 100 of these! Oh my word, I can't wait to shop on Friday! Saturday I plan on being up to my ears in pastry cream!
Oh delicious, I really want to try them. I did Boston Cream Pie on the weekend, I posted a picture on my blog - it was pretty good, I think, I'd never had one before, lol. Everyone who tried it loved it. Cream puffs might be next for me :-)
I forgot to tell you that I totally thought these had cream in the center...ha!
Our company was wonderful - relaxed, easy to talk to people. They have kids that got along great with our kids... it was fun. Lots of talking and laughing, realizing we were fairly compatible friends, and promises of getting together again soon.
I know this is going to shock some of you.. but I am naturally shy. I am not super comfortable with people I don't know well and it isn't the easiest thing for me to have strangers in my home. But, I am getting so much better at it. Daniel would be the first to tell you that. I just keep putting myself out there - keep putting myself in situations where I really have to extend beyond my comfort zone. I can't afford to be shy! I need friends - friends who will be my family where ever we are currently stationed.
I find that my best offense, in this ongoing battle with myself, is to pretend. I pretend I am super comfortable, super relaxed, super outgoing... And guess what! Suddenly I am! I am finding I have to pretend less and less often. I am becoming the extrovert I've always wished I could be.
About those beautiful flowers... I needed a centerpiece to go with a white table cloth. I had the beautiful green bowl and I had a few roses from my rose bushes, but I needed more. So, I visited the unoccupied house next door whose rose bushes I trim. I clipped a few from there. I needed just a few more so I visited another unoccupied home. I clipped three more... Perfection.
A beautiful, free centerpiece. And let me just tell you - it smelled a hundred times more beautiful than it looked.
oooo, girl, you totally free-flowered yourself! woo hoo! they are gorgeous!!
Megan
Love the centerpieces! So simple yet gorgeous.
I think your BBQ sounds wonderful and the fact you guys seem to be making new friends just makes it even better. Friends always make a new home so much better.
Oh..and as far as being shy? I never would have guessed. You seem so outgoing and vivacious! Never in a million years would I peg you as shy! :) Not that there's anything wrong with that. I'm a shy girl myself.
Wait, you served sweet tea! Girl, you are impressing me:) I'd never know you were from the north if you hadn't confessed as much.
Glad you are having fun, meeting new people. I hope they know how lucky they are to meet you:)
I loved my rosebush at Kirtland. I could smell it when the wind would blow, which was quite often as you know in ABQ.
I'm glad you are making friends and good memories there.
We loved our time there so much we plan on coming back to retire when it's time.
What a cool idea...it sounds like fun to invite new people over for a delicious dinner! You seem to have quite the gifting in the area of hospitality.
Yummm, what is blueberry surprise? It sounds good!
I too am fairly shy around new people...or in large groups, which most people would never guess about me either! In person, I have been accused of being stuck up, when really, I'm just not very good at making "small talk" type of conversation with people I don't know. It's kind of stressful when trying to meet new people! I'm proud of you for pushing your own boundaries!
Oh my, I just love the flowers!! They are gorgeous! Nothing better than a BBQ on a Sunday evening!!!
Beautiful centerpiece. Sounds like a great meal, too ( : I second 'new girl' in saying that I would never have pegged you as shy either- but it's great you are challenging that part of your personality and getting out there. My guess is that you'll have no trouble meeting friends ( :
Your flowers are amazing, girl, AMAZING!
Your bbq sounded perfect! I am shy around people I don't know either, so I am proud of you for stepping outside of your comfort zone.
Good for you! Everyone--extro or intro--vert needs to work on their weak areas.
And being an extrovert isn't always everything it's cracked up to be :-)
I've found that what you all are doing works really well; often it just takes one person (couple) w/ initiative, and voila--friends!
Gorgeous centerpieces. But you are shy? Hmm...never would have guessed. Good on ya for having people over!
Photo by EveWell obviously I can't answer the military question, but I can answer the :What would make people enjoy this Monday night thing?: question.
I love conversation, love food, love people. I'd steer away from anything overly planned - as that might feel too regimented. Norah Jones is always a good relaxer in the background and a welcoming smile always wins me. But we know you can manage that smile pretty well. :)
And don't be too smug - we know your kids are totally way cuter than theirs - but don't tell them that, okay?
We used to be Air Force...10 years ago...I loved the free health care....what I wasnt crazy about was being so far away....
I too like you, love the aspect of experiencing different states, countries and cultures. All while meeting people from all over. Without being a military life I'm sure I wouldn't have experienced Louisiana the way that I am and I never would be able to live in Italy for three years of my life. That's what I really love about it.
If I could change one thing it would probably be with deployments. I've never been through one with Sean even though he's been before. I worry about what could happen and at times that really stresses me out. Knowing that I won't always have him at home though makes me appreciate my time with him more.
Oh..and as far as the military wives get-togethers you were talking about, those sound like so much fun! I would love it if we had something like that around here.
Generally speaking, I love military life, but these deployments are wearing on me. We live on deployment time now and there is nothing else. We're either deployed, recovering from deployment or preparing to deploy, and it is just so draining. If the tempo was slower, it would be so much more manageable.
What I love? the health care and the strength it has brought our family. I used to like the moving around. We have done it a little to much lately but was fun, now that the kids are in school and getting into higher grades it makes it harder. It breaks my heart every time they have to say good-bye to friends.
Girls night is such a good idea. I would suggest adding in a game like Taboo, it makes everyone laugh and you find out more about now their minds work
I miss the camaraderie, the free health care, and the sheer pride of being a part of something so honorable (esp in a war time).
I love the idea of a wine and dessert night. That sounds like a lot of fun!
Obviously we've only been doing this a short while, but I adore the people and the friendships. The instant bonds that only occur under such a stressful lifestyle but that last for a lifetime. I'll miss that sense of community and camaraderie that surrounds the military lifestyle.
Living this life during a time of war is both honorable and exhausting. Everyone is either deployed, getting ready to deploy, or recovering from a deployment. The tempo seems to be wearing on a lot of families right now.
Your girls' night sounds fun! I wish I was close, I love things like that :)
Funny you bring this up today because I was just having a similar conversation with my neighbor last night :)
I cannot imagine NOT being a military wife now. I love it. I really do. Knowing that my husband is contributing to something so vast for the benefit of our country is wonderful. It makes the periodic sacrifices so worth it. The heath care = awesome! (we would have gone bankrupt as civilains trying to take care of Dillon's care financially if it hadn't been for the military). I love living on base. (not our house specifically- but the atmosphere). There are great schools for the kids, great shopping, and a wonderful sense of community.
And the travel! Oh yes! I was just saying last night that when J retires we're going to have to buy an RV or something, because I cant see myself just living in one spot now for decades on end. I want to see the world :) And I was never that way until I married into the military. I was scared to death to leave home initially, lol.
The most difficult part of military life for us has been just as much a blessing too. The frequent separations have been difficult. But they've caused us to work hard on our marriage, and I know we've both grown and matured and ultimately become stronger because of them. Plus, there are times when I miss my family terribly. But again, had we married and never left home there's a good chance we'd be divorced by now. Both our families tend to be a little TOO involved sometimes if you know what I mean, haha. And it was good that J and I got out on our own and learned to solve our own problems and set up our own unique family without everyones 2 cents from day 1.
My only other concern that surfaces often is for our children. I wonder how this life will affect them with the constant moving and starting over. I wish they were able to have a "home" town. But instead when people ask them where they're from they'll have to say "I'm from all over". I wish they had the opportunity to know their grandparents better. But I suppose they wont know anything other than what they've grown up in and wont have much to compare it to. It's just oh-so-different from how their father and I grew up...
I've just realized that every time you ask a question about military life I blab on and on and on :P Sorry! I guess it's something I'm passionate about.
I LOVE being a military wife...every time he starts talking about getting out and being "just" a reservist, I start having panic attacks...
I LOVE not having to pay $300+ per month for health insurance, plus co-pays!
I LOVE the sense of community.
I LOVE seeing different parts of the country.
I LOVE the secure way of life...our housing is taken care of, health care, and provisions made for our future.
Things I might change?
....ummm, dare I say it? Stupid people who "play" the system, making the rest of us look bad.
...."outsourcing" of military jobs to private contractors.
Your get-together sounds like a blast! Can I come?!?
What I love about the military is the sense of patriotism and being a part of something much greater than myself. For us, it's awesome to see our children grow up with a respect for our military, our nations leaders, and an understanding of the sacrifices made so that we can live in Freedom. And a great analogy that we see in real life as to God's love for us.
What I dislike about the military? Paperwork!!
Have a great time Monday night! I hosted a "We Survived 100 Days" party when the guys here had been deployed for 100 days. It was a great way to connect with the wives. I made them a treat bag with a cute quote saying thingy on it, we ate, talked, laughed, and just had a good time enjoying the company of other women.
What I loved about active duty: free health care; base priveledges like the commisary, BX and free gym/ pool; the comradery of other military families; job security; free legal stuff like our wills; the sense of duty; paid leave... we had it good!
I didn't like the run around we get (at this base) to get an appointment or talk to a nurse or doctor about something. I also have to agree with the paperwork comment for Mike's sake. That drives him crazy. And the deployment thing freaks me out a little. I met Mike right after he got back from his only one so far... we know he will go in the guard now, and I am not looking forward to it. If I just close my eyes will it go away?
Your get together sounds like fun! My little obvious tip-- supply other beverages other than wine and let people know. I don't drink, and it would make me more comfortable going to something, if I knew that wasn't going to be the main focus of the evening. Also helping set up or suggesting a list of babysitters for those whose husbands aren't home would probably be helpful. Have fun!
I really love the fact that we are a military family, it's a little different in Australia. We don't have free medical or base housing but we have other perks. I'm just so proud to be a military spouse, I'm proud of my sailor for serving our country. I like the fact that you are always testing yourself, whether how you are going to cope with the next deployment, leaving new friends or family but I really love the military.
What I don't like is when my sailor spends about 6 months of a year away from home, I wish he could be here everynight.
The get together sounds like a great idea, a few of the spouses get together here and it's so much fun. I wish I was a little closer I'd love to have a chat to you about the military.
Take care :)
Ally
Funny you should ask these questions now, as they're something that have been on our hearts and minds lately. We have some big decisions to make soon regarding the military, retirement, etc.I love being a part of my husband's passion for his career. I'm proud to be married to a soldier and I'm glad that my kids have a soldier for a father, even though it means he's missed a lot of their young lives. Job security, BAH, and special pays are nice perks.I could do without the gossip and cliques you can sometimes encounter when it comes to spouses. One thing I wish I could change is non-military people's (mis)conceptions of military families or what it's like to be a military wife. Your ladies' night sounds like fun! I used to shy away from such things, but now I long for them.
Right now I'm not so much loving the military life as I am suffering through lol. No, I do, for the most part, enjoy being an Army wife. I love the fact that I had our beautiful baby boy for free. I also love that I can get a gallon of milk at the commissary for $2.59 instead of $4.10 off post.
Good luck at the get togethers!
I love the free health care, free prescriptions, the support network the military gives. I love the pay raises, I love the way they are fair in promoting--in order to be promoted you have to actually work for it!
The one thing that I don't like is the moving. I love going to new places and seeing different pparts of teh world, but the bad thing that comes along with that is leaving your best friends. That to me is the hardest part.
Your Monday nite get together sounds amazing! I am so jealous! I wish someone did stuff like that here. I haven't found many people to hang out with here, yet. It sounds like so much fun, girl!
Thanks for this post! I stumbled on your website while looking for a real-life dose of military wife wisdom, and have been hooked ever since! We'll be making a move towards the military in the near future, and I needed some reassurance - I don't know what to expect! Your perspective is so cheerful and refreshing - you've given me a lot of confidence that I can be a military wife, too! Instead of a big scary unknown, now I'm armed with all sorts of helpful insights and advice. I love all your posts, but these are especially helpful to me - you don't realize how much of a change you've made in my attitude - sorry if this is creepy - but thanks so much!!! :)
What do I love? I pretty much love it all. I may complain about the healthcare, but it is free and it isn that bad. I actually love the moving, really I do. We move in 4 months but I am so ready.
What would I change? The goodbyes. Had one last night and it hurt. And I guess I would change the sepertions, because after 8 months I am ready to have him home.
I love all of it, I do think of moving as a paid vacation and the opportunity to go places we wouldn't otherwise go if we were civilian. I love the benefits, I love the medical and I love being a part of something important...
I think the ONLY thing I hate about it is that at times I feel there is not enough focus on the families and definitely the deployments....I could do without those LOL
Ok, I feel like I'm agreeing with everyone else. The health care, the base housing, the benefits of the BX and Commissary. The list goes on and on.
What I don't like...the travel. But it comes with the job. My hubby is gone about 200 days a year (not all consecutively, thank goodness), but that does make for a stressful time at home. I agree with Mrs. Staff Sgt. that it does strengthen the marriage. Keeps the flame burning! :) So, that's what I think!
I love the constantly changing life, the challenge of it all. Even though I hate missing him, I find myself getting just a little bit excited when he goes to sea because I know it will herald a new adventure for me. And homecomings, they rock!
I love that he will be going to the detailer next year and we are already talking about all the fun possibilities. I love the chance to be out of debt, have our babies for no out of pocket cost, and save a whole lot more money than we ever did as civilians.
However, I hate the fact that we can NEVER plan for ANYTHING. Vacations especially. They are always last minute, rarely when we first thought they would be taken, and I never really start breathing until we are actually on the plane and on our way. Like our Hawaii trip next month, which is still not completely booked because of some serious doubt about whether it would happen. Yeah, I've gotten good at throwing stuff together last minute...
And a get together; I'd totally go. I should be better about doing such things; the few times my girlfriends and I have done so, it's been so much fun. My biggest hangup would definitely be whether or not I had a husband, though. Babysitters are not easy to come by, especially at night.
since I was pretty much "born into the military" this is all I know - I don't know any other way of life :)
I do agree one of the more positive aspects is being able to move around and see new places, meet knew people.
I know a lot of people complain about tricare/military doctors, but that is one benefit I'm really grateful to have...the insurance. Having 2 babies and not having to pay anything for either birth. Looking at a statement from Kayla's last set of ear tubes where the dr "charged" 30,000! Of course tricare didn't pay that much, but we didn't pay anything out of pocket either. I'm really grateful for that!
Is there anything better than a candid photo? I think not. Case in point. This is my life, friends. Loud, crazy, hilarious, and most times wonderful.Any chair that can hold all three is pretty great in my book!! I'm a cheek kisser too, and as you know I have a nice set around here to squish and kiss all day long!
I am personally a fan of the smooch that is 10 smooches in one - those little baby nibble kisses. :) And I think I love your chair - looks like the perfect chair for nursing an over-8-month old baby. Oceana had to fed on the couch, because I never had enough room for her legs to hang off the edge of my lap in a rocking chair or armchair. She sprawled when she ate...
I sooooo get the cheek kissing. I repeatedly kiss both my girls' fat little faces, and tease them in a thick fake accent about being "little French girls."
No judgment on the chair,it looks comfy!
She is wonderful. They are all wonderful. :)
So cute!!!!
p.s. We call our baby Squishy.
LOVE the cheeks! My baby boy has sweet, chubby cheeks, too and I kiss them all day long :)
I really dig the chair, too!
You have a beautiful family :)
Very cute pictures. Your kids are all so sweet.
I love baby cheeks, and soft baby skin :) You can never give too many kisses! And Eliza's hair bow is beyond cute...I love putting bows and ribbons in my little ones hair :)
I'm dying for a chair with the perfect amount of squish, no hatin' here. LOVE that first picture of you all up in Miss Eliza's face, so cute. I love her cheeks! The second photo is just sweet, one you will look back on with a smile for years to come.
PS - this reminded me, I finally made it the store and now I have all the ingredients for a purple something for one Ms. Eve:)
Hi I found your blog from 4 reluctant ent. I did the military wife shift for 8 years. Thanks for your family's sevice to our country. You are a great photographer, beautiful pictures. I like pinching a smooching cheeks too!
When I saw that chair I thought, "Now that looks like something I could sleep in!" I could wear my butt print into that bad boy. In that pic of you and Eliza her sweet cheeks look petal soft! The pic of the three amigos is adorable!
There's nothing like a plump baby to make you feel that all is right with the world. Give those chubby cheeks an extra kiss for me! :-)
those are some SWEET cheeks!
brittany
Your box should be arriving this week!
Woo Hoo! xo
what sweet pictures! couldn't you just eat those cheeks with a spoon?! precious!
Yup, I can't get enough of kissing fat cheeks! I think Gabby is already getting annoyed with me and she's only 3 months! But have you seen her cheeks? Check out the latest pic I put up - there's just no resisting!
Eve is just too funny in that picture - no lack of personality there! I have no idea where she gets it from :)
Those cheeks are fabulous, I'd be kissing them all day long too!!
oh, we have some good squishin' here too! h just got a cheekfull a few minutes ago. just so stinkin' cute...
Megan
Cream Puffs for the neighbors
Cream Puffs for usThose look unbelievably good. Wow. We'll be in Houston next Thursday, but you actually aren't too far for us to visit for "Dessert for Dinner: Take ???". Ha ha.
What a fun summer tradition for you kids. Will this continue year round?
Ooh! Yes. Me! Me! Me! :) Hahaha! Looks amazing!
(I ate almost an entire baking pan of botched rhubarb crumble... but who cares, it was still sweet and rhubarb-y, even if it wasn't right... and the crumble settled inside the fruit.... Dessert and I are FRIENDS!)
Count me in for next week!!! :) Those look delicious. I can't wait to try the Boston Cream Pie recipe, I love to bake, but I haven't tried that recipe before. And I wouldn't want my taste buds hating me forever!! ;)
Have a great day :)
darn it, andrea, you are perfect. and EVERY time i see it, i love that plate color more.
Megan
Oh girl. Cream puffs are this Momma's FAVORITE! Which might explain why I look like one! This came from the Julia Child? (note to self: Check out Julia next time at library).
I kind of had dessert for dinner last night. While at Whole Foods, hubby and I split a cannoli! I'm good to go as long as it's creme filled!
YUM! I've been lovin' your "dessert for dinner" idea since you started it...and I'm thinkin' my kiddos probably would not be opposed to our family doing a little of the same! :) Not sure mine would be pretty enough for pictures, but perhaps with some practice there'd be something worthy of a blog post photo! :)
Also, in answer to your previous question about where my dad was based, way back in the day when he was in the Air Force (I was a baby-4yrs old...that's like 25 years ago...UGH!), I honestly don't know (I'll ask him when I talk to him next) but does the fact that we lived in Alamagordo give it away?
--Tamara
Oh please, please, please share this recipe!!! Those look awesome.
Those look amazing! I totally wish I was your neighbor so I could pop over for the tasty treats that always seem to be residing at your house. You can expect me for dinner next week! :)
Oh those look soooo good!
Yum...I love cream puffs! It used to be tradition that I make them for Christmas every year- they're the best! Unfortunately, I can't have anything made with wheat anymore...which basically means no breads, cakes, ect. =( Sigh...I'll try to survive. Thanks for reminding me of what I'm missing out on! ;)
I know this is probably a stupid question, but are you actually ONLY making dessert for dinner once a week? Sugar on an empty stomach makes me sick, so this kind of sounds icky to not have some real food, too, but I know I'm weird!
You're hurting me over here! I'm impressed. . . and hungry ( :
I made these once and they were TO DIE FOR... only mine were not this perdy... or conistent. Mine came in jumbo or extra-irregularly shaped. :)
Looks yummy! one of my absolute favs!
OK. I sort of had dessert for dinner last night. :) I made Belgian Waffles with strawberries, blueberries and whipped cream. The kids kept saying "I want more dessert, please." You've inspired me!
Yes, please do share the recipe, I concur with other requests.
And I have never had these before either, Can't even imagine what they are exactly. Other than cream in the middle, duh. So I am dying to see the list of ingredients.
How much do your kids LOVE dessert for dinner nights?
those look fantastic!!! Our Italian buddy's mom makes the best cream puffs ever . . . they are to die for. We're having dinner guests this weekend and I think I'm going to try Boston Cream Pie . . . I read about it here last week or the week before and have been thinking about it ever since. I'll let you know how it goes :-) Thanks for the inspiration!!
Next Thursday? I'd make the 14 hour drive for cream puffs! Yum!
oh my goodness, seriously COUNT ME IN. I can't even handle these posts... this is the worst yet! now I'M going to be craving cream puffs until i get them!
A gratuitous picture of our littlest Air Force "brat"I'm a navy wife and we've never lived in base housing, but aside from that being a possible barrier to making friends with navy wives, it's just not that easy. We have much more luck making friends with civilians than we've ever had with military families. The husbands are usually quite nice, but for some reason, the wives seem to think that THEY are the ones with the rank and they lay on the pomp and circumstance quite thickly.
It could just be that I've met the wrong women though, but I feel none of the instant bonding that they depict between the wives on that show with the navy wives I've met. There have been the "we're in the same boat so we might as well give this a stab" type of hesitant friendships, but for the most part the reality is nothing like the show.
I suppose the one key thing that holds us all back is that at times, we feel like spectators in our own lives because we never know when we may have to pick up and leave everything. It's simply easier to not get involved. I know that I'm guilty of that.
Ok, I've never seen the show so I can only speak from experience. The army wives I know aren't as close knit as you are describing. And, the fraternization thing is so much more frowned upon in the Army than in the AF. Many of my closer friends at bases where we've been stationed are on the opposite side of the officer/enlisted fence than I am. No one ever seems to bat an eye.
As far as the houses go, it all depends on the base, with our experience. At Malmstrom, it was totally like that. In the summer, we were all outside until the late hours of the night with kids playing in everyone's yard. Everyone's dogs out playing together. I used to leave my house unlocked when I left and would come home to a note on the counter from a neighbor saying, "I borrowed some mayo!" and think nothing of it. We haven't been at base where the neighbors were that close since then. At Andrews, it was just weird. Here, we are out at least three times a week with neighbors right next to us and have cookouts and such but the commrodarie stops there with neighbors...again, it's weird because of the size/location of the base. I could go on and on...can ya tell? :)
Well, around here (as you know from my complaining err- I mean descriptions) the houses ARE for sure right on top of each other and there aren't really "yards" unless you count sporadic common areas. So all the younger kids do play together outside and I've gotten to know several other military wives that way. It's very similar to what you see on Army Wives as far as the enlisted housing set up. (except, I'm convinced it's nicer on the show- they look like duplex's instead of derelict 8-plex's, ha!)
The fraternization is all wrong in my experience. There's NO WAY any enlisted wife I've ever known would be hanging out with the commander's wife. HA! Bwahahahaha! Not in a million years!
In fact, Dillon attended base school last year and he coincidentally ended up in a class full of many (mostly lower ranking) officer's children. Those women (the Mom's I mean) wouldn't even talk to me at school functions. There's definitely a strong class distinction on this base and we generally don't mix well. Quite sad really...
Although I will mention that the higher ranking officer's wives are very pleasant to me at church. But it's not like we'd ever be invited for dinner at their house or anything :P Right or wrong, It just isn't done.
You mention instant camaraderie, and I've found some of that here in a few special girlfriends. But it doesn't happen that way instantaneously with everyone.
There are all kinds of people in the military just like in the civilian world- and some people like to be left alone, plain and simple. We've lived here just long enough now to see the first "shift" of old families moving out and new families moving in and our block is now full of "neighbors that barely come out of their houses". Last summer there were about 4 of us SAHM's that would all sit outside and chat while our kids played in the afternoon. Our husbands would join too many times if they had a chance. Now they're all gone and I'm lucky if most of the new wives will nod at me in the parking lot when we pass. That's been difficult for me to get used to. I feel like it should be like you see on TV. And it was sort of that way when we first moved here. We should all band together, right? I want to knock on doors and welcome new families to the neighborhood with baskets of cookies. But I'm certain they would think I was CRAZY. Maybe people just aren't as social as they once were in general?? I don't know...
And wow! That was the longest comment ever!
I'm so glad you posted this topic because I too have been wondering this for some time. I LOVE the show Army Wives, although I'm an Air Force wife myself but we live of an Army Post. Let me tell you life on Fort Meade isn't even close to what the show makes you think it would or should be. I've yet to make any connections in the almost 2 years I've lived on post. I'm really looking forward to reading everyone's responses!
We're kind of in that awkward in-between stage being a lower officer family. We aren't high ranked enough to be "top brass", but we have that whole commission thing between us and the enlisted families who have been doing this for 15 years long than we have.
Our neighborhood is really close. We've only lived here three months (our first experience with on post housing) and we have yet to lock our door. We frequently run over to the neighbors' houses to let their dogs out to go to the bathroom, borrow some random ingredient or kitchen item, and if we forget to take out our trash, someone else ALWAYS does it for us. I cannot even walk to the mailbox which is three doors down without stopping to chat with someone. And during the school year, there is an entire group of mommies who pull out the lawn chairs and chat in someone's front yard about 30 minutes before school lets out.
As for the whole rank thing, we're only O-2s. Most of my closest friends are also wives of O-1s or O-2s, but I am also really good friends with the wife of an O-5 and an O-4 and a good handful of O-3s. So, as far as the relationship between Denise and Claudia Joy, that doesn't seem far off at all. But, that being said, I will have to admit that we just don't socialize with the enlisted wives. Shameful, I know, but it just doesn't happen. Not purposefully, I would never ask for someone's husband's rank before inviting them over for coffee or dinner, but just because we don't move in the same circles. My entire neighborhood is made up of similarly ranking families, the people my husband is friends with are similarly ranked, and the women I meet at the social events I am required to go to usually are either my husband's rank or vastly outrank him! Our FRG (family readiness group to the non-army people) is totally dysfunctional and non of the officer's wives participate because it is so screwed up and just a total drama factory, so unless I make friends at the commissary, I really just have no opportunity to meet anyone else.
So that's my entirely too long comment :)
Oh, I mean to add..I did find those instant connections here. Some of my dear friends I have only known less than a year and they are nearly sisters to me now. So, maybe it's just the drinking water here....we are all eerily close!
I should add that I have not gone out of my way to make friends with the military wives because I have in the past and really disliked losing contact with friends I'd gotten quite close to when we all got stationed elsewhere. It's stupid, but I'm always so busy that I think if I just cultivate friendships that are going to be more permanent, it would be a better way to spend the little time I have for socializing. It sounds so cold, but maybe other wives are the same way??
Oh, not that is matters but since everyone else is saying I'm an enlisted wife my husband is an E-5. The Commander's wife in my husband's unit is VERY nice and social and plans outtings once a month for all the spouses. So I have socialized with Officer's Wives but only in group settings.
Ok, we're National Guard, so it's completely different...but there is still somewhat of a barrier making friends with officers wives. I agree that many times the wives think they're the one with rank. Sad really.
As for the show, I love it. I don't think that the scnearios themselves are true to life, but the emotions are...and it does enlighten the general population of some of the feelings we go through. Other than that, it's just entertainment.
By the way, Congrats! I see you won the Canning Prize over at the Reluctant Entertainer! Way to Go!!
I'm looking up the word Fraternization... Then I'll reread the post :)
My sister is a Chaplain's Wife, in the Air Force. He's a Captain at Andrews. From what I hear There's not a lot of Fraternizationlike that. Infact they are trying to hold more gathering for families to meet and greet.
With my short 2 years of Air Force wife experience, I have really different experiences. The short time that we lived in Hawaii, the connections I had with other military wives of all branches was through our church and there, there were no barriers between enlisted and officers. In fact, our closest friends were an Army officer and his wife. I think it was the church environment and the fact that I didn't know any differently. I was totally new at the military wife thing, as you might remember.
Living off base here at Hill AFB, was different too. I knew literally one other wife that lived on base because her husband worked with mine. Both enlisted.
I have never seen Army Wives, but I am interested now. Where do you find it?
I have been reading everyone`s comment and I just had to leave one as well. It should not matter what rank your husband wears, you are not wearing it. So every other wife you meet at an military Post should be seen as just a wife.
If you are a nice and friendly and outgoing person then u come across just like that. Maybe instead of waiting for everyone else to say Hi to you , you do the first step and say HI to them.
We are subforce, and I think our experience is probably as close to Army Wives as it gets. Subforce is different. Our guys live on top of each other when at sea - enlisted and officers included, and the frequent deployments put the wives (there are no husbands because no women serve on submarines) together a lot more often than most commands. You have to go the FRG meetings if you want to know what's going on with the boat while it's away because information like that can't go down the phone tree until it's imminent.
That said, there are always those people who really don't try at all to get involved and wonder why they don't have any friends. It takes effort, whether you're living on base or not. I was an ombudsman for a couple of years and absolutely couldn't STAND the people who insisted they weren't going to have anything to do with meetings and wanted me to personally tell them what I was going to say. Um, no, sorry, I'm not going to have a personal meeting with every wife on the boat just because you have a bias against the FRG.
I do have the benefit of my church, however. Every time we move, it's easy to find a group of people to hang out with because the LDS church is the same religion no matter where you are. Most of my friends I met there, and while I tend to gravitate toward the military wives because there's less explaining to do, I also have quite a few civilian friends as well.
We live in base housing, and it annoys me how many parents just let their kids run wild. You rarely see the adults around. I don't get it; are they all inside playing video games or something? There is this 8 year old girl who is always on our playground; and she told me she lives a good ten minute walk away. I've NEVER seen her parents, ever. And she's been coming around for a couple years now. That's just not the way I parent my kids.
Bottom line, I think Army Wives is ridiculous, even though things do ring true to me at times (which is probably why I'm still watching it). I have a friend who's the wife of a submarine captain, but not our sub. It's never been an issue, although I think my husband sometimes stays back because he's enlisted. If anything, making friends with officer's wives is hard because of the guys we are married to. We'll never hang out as a couple, so that makes it awkward sometimes. We may not be in the military, but that doesn't mean we can completely ignore it, either. It's just not as simple as people on the outside think it is.
It's a problem no matter where you live or what you do, however, that neighbors ignore one another. I think all of us need to learn to reach out and stop waiting for others to come to us (me included!).
Air Force wife. Have been for 9 years now. 3 bases and now a year seperation has occured. My husband is on officer, but he is prior enlisted and some of out best friends are enlisted. We dont care at all about rank and neither do our friends.
Our first base we lived off base. Had lots of military friends, all the same rank as my husband. We were all young, newly married and our husbands just commissioned. Then we moved to CA, lived on base and did a lot with our friends. All same rank again. Then we moved to Cannon. My best friend there was enlisted and many others were enlisted. We lived off base, but right behind the housing I think you may be in. We did a lot with our church and everything with them.
Here, back in OH, while hubby is gone, I am back in base housing. Living with neighbors again of the same rank. Our neighborhood DOES A TON together. All the time. It is great. We move in November and I know we will live off base and I hope to have this again, but I am doubtful.
That show is so fake. I can't stand it. Every time I see a commercial for it I wonder if that is really what people think we live like? Um, yeah, I'm pretty sure that doesn't happen in any of the services. I have lived in Army housing before (for 4 years) and it was the kind that was extremely close together and I only knew the people right next door for the whole 4 years. I have friends who live in the new housing they built here which is very nice and would be easy to socialize with neighbors and they still don't know any of them.
As far as the O vs. E thing, most all bases I have ever been to have the housing, clubs, and everything else completely separated. There is a sign in our O housing that says not open to public without invitation from occupant. So you can't even drive down the street there.
Grrrrr! That show really gets my goat!
I'm glad I'm not the only one who questions this.
Everyone always says how close knit and friendly military people are. I, for one, have not seen that in action. I've not experienced friendly neighbors and I certaintly haven't made friends instantly. I've been at my first duty station for six months and there are 2 girls that I talk to from time to time.
We're enlisted and the only time I've ever encountered the officer wives was at our battalion ball.
I wish I had some close-knit friends that they portray on the show, but I don't and I'm not sure I will anytime soon.
BTW, you're cute and sassy sentence in your blog had me rolling. :)
I haven't watched the show, so I'm speaking from experience rather than in relation to that. I've apparently had a vastly different experience from others. My hubby has been active duty for 6 years now and we have 5 duty stations and 2 deployments under our belts. I've had close friends at each duty station - whose husbands were both enlisted and officer. I've also met several women on both sides of the fence who refused (either blatantly or more subtly) to associate with people on the other. But the vast majority of wives I've met have not been that way at all. To me, it doesn't matter what rank your husband wears. If we click, we click and we are blessed to have found each other. If not, well - we may not be best friends but that doesn't mean we can't be at the very least civil and at best, actually supportive of each other.
I'm not a fan of the Army Wives show, but mostly because the first season really turned me off. It wasn't very realistic to me at all. I haven't found the instant connection with many of the Army wives I've met. My best friend is an Army wife and we instantly hit it off but it turned out we were from the same state and had a lot in common from the get go. Eric's enlisted right now but is going to the ROTC to become an officer so we will have been on both sides of the fence. As far as I've seen there isn't the fraternization going on that they depict in the show. The officer wives that I've met have been friendly but they keep their distance from the enlisted. I haven't lived on post yet so I don't know about the sitting around outside and bonding while the children play, but all the housing I've seen has been really close together, although they each have a separate yard, even if it is little.
we always heard so many air force life topics in coversation in rapid city. hmmm...some were good, some not...so good.
thanks for the insights :)
love the peachy picture!!
Megan
So yes the show is fake to an extent. We are army and live on post housing, there are kids that run all over and play in the yards, the parents of those kids sit outside and watch them and socialize. We have 3 plexes and 4 plexes in our neighborhood ranging from E1 to E6, the other neighborhoods have different rank requirements to live in the neighborhood.
One of my good friends, met her at church, but her husband is a Captain and was a CO of a company. He is awesome! They don't treat me or my husband any differently. They actually help us if we have questions or what not. My hubs is an E5 now but I still don't know too many wives in the company. The CO's wife and 1SGT wife are really friendly though and seem willing to help with anything that anybody needs.
I haven't watched the show, so can't compare with what they are televising.
I think enlisted and officer spouses have a harder time getting together/meeting because most everything is separated on base as it is - housing, clubs etc.
I have been fortunate not to experience such blatant discrimination among the spouses here though, maybe we've just been lucky with who we've met?
We used to have 2 officer wives in our Bunco group (they've since moved and I still keep in touch w/one of them) and no one thought anything of it.
Joe used to be in a detachment which was very small. There were about 5-6 pilot wives and 3 enlisted wives. The sq commander's wife had monthly spouse socials and always included the enlisted wives - it was for spouses, didn't matter the rank. The 3 of us used to go to one of the officer's wife's house for scrapbooking. His 2nd commander's wife at the Det was the first person to visit me in the hospital after Kayla was born and brought me a handmade blanket. They also had a baby shower for me. We were invited to Det Christmas parties at the commander's house (sq commander, not base commander) as they were a Det function, and again, not separated by rank.
Now he's back in the Comm Sq and I haven't had any contact with hardly any spouses there -enlisted or officer!
I've met many officer wives via MOPS too - not that we've really hung out outside of MOPS, but we get along during MOPS :)
On another note - not sure if you got my email, just wanted to let you know you guys are invited to Kayla's bday party this Sat :)
Ok so... this isn't really going to contribute to the flow here, but, I just wanted to say thank you Andrea (and everybody else)!
With my husband joining the AF I've had all of these questions, and I'm so excited to have so many new perspectives. Thanks again!
Wow, I guess my experience is completely different from everyone else's! We live on Maxwell AFB and my husband is an E-5, but I am friends with the base commander's wife and with the Air University commander's wife. Our children attend the school here on base and are always in the same class, which is how I met them. I have gone to lunch with them and attended parties at their houses. My children are always invited to their children's birthday parties and over to play. We ( myself, other enlisted wives I am friends with, and several officers' wives) have a monthly girls' night out. This is of course the first time I have lived on base, but I have not noticed that much separation between the officers' wives and the enlisted wives. Now I am a little scared about PCSing next year.
I'm jealous of Jamie. I want to go live with her on her base! lol That's how it should be everywhere if you ask me!
What is really boils down to is the individual.
Just like in subdivision and jobs outside of the military you find people who think they are better than others and will only hang out with people of a certain status. Likewise there are those of us who judge you for the person you are and see no stripes.
After thinking on this all day, I came back to add more thoughts. Except I got here and realized that Stacia just posted exactly what I was thinking. In almost nine years married to the military (lol) I have been at four bases and one civilian area assignment (not near a base) and I've found that it's more about the individual people that you meet rather than a general "officers wives" vs "enlisted wives" type thing. My experience has never been anything other than positive in that reguard. As a matter of fact, until I read Andrea's post about being snubbed by the major's wife, I hadn't heard of anything like that in a long time!
I haven't seen the show you mentioned, but in my experience, as a Marine wife whose lived in base housing for ten years I have always experienced the close houses and the children running and playing in between houses and in our yards. I have met so many amazing women and just a small handful of those who I didn't mesh with. Especially in Okinawa, I have to say, most neighbors do become instant friends because it is all we have here besides our immediate family.
The show sounds interesting...I want to see it!
I got to see the show for the first time over the weekend of the 4th...very interesting...
Anyway, we're a Navy family, living in Enlisted housing with Navy and Marine families, and maybe a few Army thrown in for good measure. I LOVE being back in military housing...we were in a VERY non-military community for 4 years, and I really missed the commeraderie. I don't have really close friends here...I swear I'm surrounded by some scum of the earth...but there are some really great people here too, and I love the fact that we have this lifestyle in common, and I know I can trust them to understand my joys and frustrations with military life.
I DID have a great experience with the CO's wife when we were in TX...I was the Ombudsman, and she was just this awesome person...friendly, and down-to-earth...but it was always kind of awkward at ship-wide events...
On a funny note, tonight my eldest daughter and I went for our evening walk through housing...we stopped off at her friend's house to ask about a class she was interested in taking. As we left, I asked what the friend's dad does.
My daughter responded, "He's in the Navy."
Yes, honey, I KNOW he's in the Navy...he lives in MILITARY housing, and just got back from a deployment on a ship. What does he DO in the Navy?
She laughed, and said "ummm...he's in the Navy?"
We had a good laugh...and I am glad that it doesn't matter to her what the parents' ranks or jobs are...I hope that point is getting across to all of my kids!
I think I'm the first Marine wife to post about this so here goes. Fraternization in the MC is a big deal. Big one. So I dont think I'll be hanging out with the CO's wife anytime soon! I worked at a nearby army base teaching so I do have some wonderful friends who's husbands are LtCol or Col, where as my husband is an E-6 but because of the differences in branch and post its not an issue.
We dont live in housing, it wasnt open when we moved up here, and its been difficult to meet people. I know a couple other wives from the squadron but it seems as if there is almost a housing "clique" now and we'll I dont care to be in it. I'm content out in town living my quiet little life. But there is a sort of unspoken bond in a way just being a Marine wife. Oh that sounds so cheesy.
Wow what a reply you got from this question!
We are AF but we used to be Army. I think it all depends on the base you're at. On Elmendorf Alaska we were pretty close with some people, some we still talk to today, while at Ft. Meade we didn't really know anyone, here on Ft. Ord again we really haven't met anyone but just recently they started moving in Officers into our neighborhoods because lack of their housing.
I don't look at rank and now that we are starting to be the "older" couple we look to help out the younger "kids" even though we are not suppose to.
About the show, I want to like it but it is kind of cheesy. The only real thing about it is the PX, it looks like they shot the show inside of a real one!
Well I'm an Air Force wife and have been one for 10 years and it's nothing like the Army Wives show. I completely agree with you, there's a comraderie but nothing like the show.
And as for the fraternization, that is just completely off, there is NO way in heck that an enlisted wife would be hanging out with the officer wives and especially the base commander's wife. LOL Yeah, not even happening!
I'm an AF wife. My Steve has been in for almost 18 months and is an E-3. I've never seen Army Wives (but have wanted to). But from personal experience, what little I have, I am extremely blessed with an over-abundance of close-nit friends I have made here at Ft. Ord, CA. I know all my neighbors, and we actually hangout together, I have tons of civi friends and mil wives friends from all branches. My close friends include officer wives as well. My hubby is enlisted. At this base, fraternization is not that big a deal. Although from talking with other wives, the Army seems to be more relaxed on the whole issue compared to sister services.
From listening to other wives, it's a matter of attitude and getting yourself out there to become close. You know the saying, "In order to have friends, you have to show yourself to be friendly". Totally true. I've lived most of my life without friends or knowing my neighbors, etc. But when Steve joined the AF, I decided that I was going to get out and make friends and I have. The ladies that I know (about 50 of them are military alone) are warm, caring, sensitive, loving, and always there for each other if we need it.
We do playgroups, girls night outs, book clubs, babysitting coop, talk to all them on the phone weekly, and we've done dinner with officers and they've come over and had dinner with us, etc. We've shared, cried, rejoiced and been there for each other in the last 18 months. I've never experienced this type of friendship or fellowship before. It's incredible!
I think there are several keys to success:
1. Get away from the computer.
2. Get away from the TV.
3. Meet your neighbors.
4. Walk right up to a complete stranger, introduce yourself, and get her #. If you say you'll call to go to lunch or have a playdate for the kids. Do it within the week of getting the #.
Just some things that worked for me.
Love you guys,
Eden
Just stumbled upon your blog-
I am an Army wife- we are stationed at Ft. Sam Houston, but we don't live on post. The houses are way nicer than those I've seen on most bases, however, lots of new, nice, and single homes are being built here, so it sort of reflects what we have. I've been to some birthday parties on base, adn the wives seem to be pretty good friends with their neighbors.
As far and the fraternization goes- I would LOVE it if we were allowed to do that! For the last almost 2 yrs I became best friends with my husbands (E5) company comander's wife. We weren't allowed to hang out, unless we invited every other wife in the company as well. It was really a bummer, because we had so much in common, and our little boys are the same age. Sometimes we would sneak and meet at a park, though. It's sad that making friends with someone who's husband of higher rank is discouraged.
I do think the only reason I've become close with other wives is because I am very involved in the company FRG (the family readiness group). If you aren't involved in something like that, you don't stand a chance.
(this is getting long- sorry!) I also think the Army Wives show is a maybe a bit different than most of us are used to, because their hubbies are super secret special forces (or whatever- I don't follow the show that much). And since the ladies are required to live on post, all next door to each other, they ARE each other's support. So in that way I can see it totally happening.
Anyway- your kids are adorable! I'm glad I stumbled upon your blog :)
Gosh... well... I am a Navy wife and have been for 9 years. My husband is currently up for Chief (E-7) and we should be getting the results soon... so... basically... if he puts on Chief... we would be fraternizing with all our old friends. Now.. do I believe in that garbage.. no... not really. I know in my husband's command there is alot of fraternization going on but not of the "just being friendly" sorts... more so on the basis of a romantic type relationship and pregnancies etc. So, there is disciplinary action being taken in those situations.
I have lived in SO many different places. Some on base, some off base. Being on base makes it difficult for us and for our children. Our girls are now losing alot of friends every few months because of PCS'ing which makes it tough. We live in a housing unit that is near the E-7 + and officer housing so many of their friends from school are children of higher ranking parents. The conversations with those parents are usually brief. BUT on the other hand, I am a Girl Scout Leader and my husband is a softball coach so we end up being more friendly with many of the higher ranking parents and go to BBQs and birthday parties etc. and just having healthy adult conversations.
I have had one decent friend here who recently moved away... I am getting closer to another person but it is still difficult to make trusting relationships. We have witnessed so much being in this housing which I am sure you could witness anywhere you live. It is such a melting pot of different nationalities, educational levels, cultures, coming from different areas of the country.. you really need to find a common interest... and that can be the tough part. GOD I have rambled... Hope I didnt bore anyone.. but... I am all for fraternazation (sp?!) LOL! Just kidding of course... I am just a human adult... same as a woman whose husband has a khaki uniform.
My roses are loving the rain! I am seeing less of the "bloom and fry" going on. Our walkway smells lovely!
Nice pictures. I especially liked the rainbow.
Love the piddle shots, they are perfect!!
What a great rainbow! And your kids are precious as always!
Happy WWWAT!
Your rainbow picture is amazing!! It looks like there are two rainbows in the picture...how cool! And of course the pictures of the kids are really sweet. Judah's plumber crack made me laugh :) Have a fantastic Wednesday!
I'm impressed that you captured that beautiful double rainbow! Great pictures!
Your pictures are always stunning! That rainbow is fantastic! And the kids look like they're having so much fun :) Jumping in puddles was one of my favorite pastimes when I was a kid too!
Very cute - got to say though, my favorite is the butt crack! Sorry Judah, just too cute :)
Must be that mom to a boy thing :)
ALicia
I love it...puddles after a storm is fantastic.
You gotta get that boy some suspenders! But if you did that, I would have missed seeing this.
Beautiful shots!
Your pictures are awesome!!!~ that rainbow one is Beautiful!!!
You're absolutely right, puddles are the best!
I remember being that small, splashing through puddles, just after the rain stopped, it's perfect summer fun :)
Both of them puddle jumping is awesome. I would frame that one. You have a great sense of photography. I am going to have to try harder.
I love all of the pictures, but the kids puddle jumping is the best! I especially love the first one of Eve, the way her feet are reflected in the puddle just makes the shot.
Happy WWWAT!
your pictures are wonderful! Of course, it helps that your kids are gorgeous :)
Those pictures are great! Made me think of being a kid (if I can remember that far back) and the pure joy that comes from jumping in puddles!!
Love all the pictures Andrea :) The one of the kids together in the puddle is by far my favorite.
Hugs,
Sandra
ohhhh i LOVE them! the smiles on the kids faces are priceless!
I love the puddle pictures! Great shots:)
Awesome pics!!! I love the midstride puddle picture! What kind of camera are you using -- my midstride pics always turn out blurry and I hate that.
ahhhh--those puddle pictures make me long for a nice summer rain! and the beauty of a rainbow after a storm--gorgeous! have a blessed wednesday!--tamara
Love the puddle jumping; too cute! Oh, that rainbow pictures is wonderful.
BEAUTIFUL Rainbow! makes me think of when we were stationed in HAwaii.... the storms we had in Texas were INCREDIBLE like you explained the ones you are having...
intense...
AS ALWAYS I LOVE your pics...
what wonderful pics!
the rainbow is gorgeous!
the pics of eve and judah are priceless as always.
LOVE the puddle pictures. :)
brittany
The Judah hiney shot made me bust out laughing! My hubby even cracked up. Get it? "Cracked" up! Oh mercy, I slay myself!
LOVE LOVE LOVE all the pics. Miss you guys, Abriella would have had a great time jumping in the puddles with Eve
SUPER cute, rain puddles are SO FUN... for, er, the kids... of course.
What great pictures. The one of the two kids jumping in the puddle is fantastic!
Nice photos.especially the double rainbow. Yep there is a second rainbow in the picture. just look closely. the second one is a little fainter and as sharp.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it!
Fantastic photos! I just love me some baby butt crack! (Um, wait...that doesn't sound so good! It's totally the "Oh my gosh that is just so cute that I just want to pinch it" sort of way, not the creepy perverted way)
I REALLY need to get a decent camera. I'm so jealous of all of these beautiful pictures everyone keeps posting.
You captured the summer well - I love all the WATER (this coming from a girl living in drought country)!
I forgot to check for a new WWWAT theme for this week. When I was checking there weren't new ones. :-(
I really liked the rainbow!
all so great! the puddle pictures were the best! i really liked the first one- with eve's reflection! too cool!
Megan
Beautiful rainbow!
Wow, how did you get those 'airborn' pics of the kids, 'over' puddles? Great!
And thank you for what both your Warrior husband and you his family, are doing for our country. Not only the military person serves. His loved ones do too.
Miss Mari-Nanci
Smilnsigh
Photos-City-Mine
Love the puddle pics, especially the one of Judah, lol! You are going to do fabulous in your photography class!
Oh . . . SO cute!! And the rainbow is magnificent. Check out Judah's little diaper-less bum :-) I hope the potty training is going well . . . I have been wondering how it's going.
Great pics! I love the plumber shot, it starts at a young age for boys, doesn't it?
awesome pics of airborne puddle jumpers! and i didn't think that New Mexico had that much green! =)
Love the puddle shots - the bum showing is just too cute!! Glad you are all enjoying new mexico!
Wow! That is all I could say :) I love the rose shot and the one of the girl just about to jump into the puddle...beautiful :)
Blessings!
~Katy
Gorgeous photos...what a beautiful rainbow!
I love rainbows. Despite all the rain out here, we don't get many good ones. Puddles, though, those are great fun!
Wonderful pictures!! You are so talented.
I always love the storms that pop up here during this time of year, too. Do they not do this everywhere? I never really thought about that before...
Great pictures! Summer storms are one of my favorite things too. The crack picture is too funny!
*crack* oh! haha. Still in potty training mode I see????
Is your life always this surreal-looking?!?!?
Gorgeous puddle shots!
Yesterday's delicious breakfast.We spend about $400 in our household as well. (We're in Utah. Hey - our states touch - four corners, baby!) Anyway, I do the whole Costco thing, along with the grocery store, and when I am in the mood I am the coupon/price matching queen. Some months I just have too much going on to be that dang organized. I've tried to lower our grocery bill, but I want to feed my family, I want to have things on hand, and I don't want to have to worry about not being able to provide. So, if I had to assume, southwest region that is, I would think $400 is average/fair. Now, what I spend on things other than food...now that is a whole other issue, lol!
we budget $336 per month for groceries for our family of four. This includes toiletries and cleaning products, but NOT diapers. I only shop at our commissary.
The way we were able to save $$$ was by making a weekly meal menu. And I also use a list that I stick to...even when there is a deal. However, I usually give myself some wiggle room with a "sweet" and a "salty" snack.
For our famiy of 7 (soon to be 8) I spend between $600 and $700 a month (this includes paper products, health and beauty, etc..). I shop at Costco and Target or WalMart. Our food bill has actually gone up because of trying to eat healthier. I've started *trying* to buy all organic, etc... I always buy organic milk and eggs, but other things are an availability basis.
There aren't usually coupons for organic or healthy products so my only advice is....COSTCO! Man, I love that place. I wish we had a Trader Joes. I hear lots of good things about them.
I'm slightly ashamed (seeing as how at the moment it's just Josh and myself), but we tend to spend approximately $300 per month on groceries. I shop at WalMart (it's the only option aside from Brookshire's, your normal little grocery store). Part of why we spend so much is because a) the city we live in has basically no options and b) I'm pretty firm as to what I want in our house. As in, Josh eats chicken almost every night, and I insist on buying fresh, organic chicken instead of Tyson frozen chicken.
Anyway, I do try to make a list and stick to it, and that does help keep my cost somewhat reasonable.
Lets see. I think we spend on average anywhere from 600 to 700 a month. That includes everything from food to cleaning supplies to eating out. We shop Walmart, DECA and Sams Club. No Costco here, and I am still crying about it. I have become a coupon queen. I print them off the web and clip them from the Sunday newspaper.
Wow...I am amazed. Next up you need to write a blog on how and where you buy, I am amazed at the $400.00 figure for your family and with you guys also eating organic and so well! We spend probably $300.00 a month on just the two of us. That's commissary and sometimes Wal-Mart too. I would love to have a Trader Joe's or Whole Foods nearby. Sean and I were talking recently about finding some local farmers or markets that had fresh fruits and veggies as we are tired of the bland taste we are getting from buying them at the store.
Do you think you could possibly do a blog on how you guys are eating this well on your budget? Maybe also about buying from local farmers and how you find them? I know you kind of did a part of that a few weeks ago, but I'd love to see more on it.
mmm. i almost took a picture of my breakfast these last two mornings. avocado and scrambled eggs with cheese. avocados are so beautiful.
i've posted on this before- but just to go along with it- we spend just around or under $350 a month- but lately the prices went up so much, that i just get what we need at sams (not that many things, but some- and only things that are way cheaper there) and i don't always take that out of my budget- bc when you buy beef or chicken in two months worth at a time, really, i'm not going to take that away from my budget, you know? so, it slips by- bc it's not complicated that way.
Megan
We currently budget $500/month (or $125/week) for groceries (this includes incidentals as well) and even this can be a challenge at times for a family of 5- and I'm a smart shopper. However, I've found since moving out West that groceries are more expensive here. Back East, I would have no trouble with this budget. On a related note, here is a link to an interesting post I read recently on the same topic: http://greenstylemom.blogspot.com/2008/06/one-week.html
It's an epidemic. I'm talking about this at my blog, too. :-)
But just to say, I take out $800 cash each month for groceries for 8 people. I spend between $600 and $700 on actual food. I usually just shop the commissary, but I'm playing a little game this month to see if it really is more expensive to eat on economy. I'm thinking not.
And I suggest that there is a strong possibility that if you aren't actually keeping track, you're probably spending more than you think. :-)
I spend about $400/month too. I MOSTLY shop at the commissary because even in So. California it's significantly cheaper than the shopping "out in town". That does include my ridiculous little habit of buying my fruit at the farmer's market.
I usually make a meal menu and that includes the food I send the husband back to base with during the week, so I guess that's not bad.
We usually budget about $300 a month. That does not include diapers etc. We do bulk shopping at Sam's club for diapers, water, chicken etc.
I find that I can save money when I do a list of what I will be making that week. Sometimes I do it for two weeks and that makes it a lot easier for me to save even MORE money.
I do look for coupons on some items and try and get organic on most things, but I do tend to splurge a little at Whole Foods. I just cannot resist. They have the best turkey bacon there!
I have NO idea how much we usually spend, but I'm in the process of drawing up a budget for us for the month. I know you do this already, but my only tip to save on groceries is to cook foods rather than buy pre-packaged! As a strict vegetarian, that means I bake vegan bread, cook veggie burgers, etc.
Here's how we do things (and granted, we're only 2 people), and we learned all we know from Crown.org--LOVE that ministry!! We went to a seminar about 6 months after we got married, and all I can say is that it was the best $40I ever spent.
Anywho, back to the issue at hand: groceries.
For us, our grocery shopping excursions and budget are for food ONLY. Everything else is tossed into our miscellaneous category (which includes cleaning supplies, toiletries, stamps, envelopes, matches, whatever else you would need for a household that isn't edible). For the two of us, I spend $180 a month. I do need to bump it up to $200 because of rising food prices, but I'm consistent and it works for us.
Ways that I "save" or am able to stick to just that budgeted amount include shopping at our local farmer's market (which is HUGE, plus the produce is way cheaper and better than going to the grocery store), and my crazy shopping schedule.
Basically, at the end of every month, I go to my Google calendar and create a dinner menu for the next month (yes, I said month). From that menu, I base my grocery list, along with things that we just always use throughout the month. We do one big shopping trip a month that includes going to Sam's, Wegman's (oh how I love Wegman's), and Aldi and the public market. I know, I'm crazy, but it doesn't take more than 2 hours round trip because I also separate my grocery list out into what to buy and where (we've done the math and know what's more economical for us to buy at Sam's and other places). Then, I do another small trip after our fresh fruit and veggies and stuff are out and that's it. Two trips a month, max.
Now, if I look at the menu and think, 'Gee, I don't really want that for dinner', I just swap it out for another meal that's on the menu that I do have all the ingredients for. Easy as pie. Unlike this comment which is rambly and a million paragraphs long!!
Thanks for talking about this today--I always love getting tips from other folks!
Blessings,
Erin
For my self I budget $100/month, for food equalling about $25.00 per week. And I can usually stick to that and still cook delicious, healthy meals.
I buy almost everything at Superstore(an incredibly low priced grocery store here in Canada) I try to only buy fruits and vegetables if they are under $1.00/lb, I can usually get organic for that price. I price compare regularly store flyers and will go to another grocery store for certains foods on sale. And I like to purchase meat on 10% Tuesdays.
But I wouldnt mind some of those stores that you talk about in the south, up here!!
Leslie
We're a family of 8...and spend (most months) less than $400...it's hard because I'm like you and don't pay a lot of attention to it. As someone else said, it is more expensive to eat healthy. I am very frustrated with that because the prices of everything is going up, and we are already down to the bare nubs, and am feeling the pressure to cook healthier, but can barely afford the steady diet of pasta and hamburger we seem to exist on at the moment...
We're a bit on the odd side here, as we're in another country - different prices and different money. But with myself, Matt, my 19 yr old sister, and Oceana we spend under $100 a week - so $400 a month. That's about $80, in USD. That includes diapers, toiletries, etc - everything. Matt takes his cellphone calculator to the store and stays under that number. He usually does the shopping - I rarely even go. Not for lack of wanting to, it's just how we work at this point. We don't eat organic, and for the most part we don't eat breakfast. Lunch usually is leftovers for us. So we're probably not the best venue to be asking...
But when we were in the US I shopped Aldi and WalMart (not that carefully) and for two of us spent under $40/week with toiletries.
I'm also not sure exactly what we spend but I estimate it at around $400. I try to do a Costco trip once per month and then the rest is commissary. It really is so much cheaper on a lot of things. I also try to fit in a Trader Joe's trip at least twice a month when I'm on that side of town because their organic dairy products are so much cheaper that it's totally worth it. Plus, they have a better selection of Annie's.
We spend probably about 250.00 a month. Due to my outragous student loans (alot) we have a very very tight budget, but we always buy the same things. We dont eat anything fancy, and I WISH I could shop organic but too expensive where we live. I would say we eat pretty balanced, alot of veggies, ground turkey, chicken and pasta. If we are having a good month I would say around 400.00. We shop at Bottom dollar, so everything is off brand (food lion brand here). Or else at walmart.
We are usually in the $300 range including Costco and toiletries. We are still learning how to fit diapers into the budget! We were trying to stock up while we had a good income to save for this summer, so we shall see... This month I am aiming for $150 or so! Wish me luck!
We don't really track our grocery budget, either. I keep it pretty simple, though. We buy everything at the commissary, except for a lot of our fruits and veggies because the ones at the commissary are downright icky most of the time. They also don't have much for organic produce, although I buy it when they do. I used to clip coupons, but now I just throw them away as I always forgot to use them and they were just a clutter problem.
So, we probably spend about 400 for groceries and other household items, plus about 50 bucks a month for various random items. The money we are saving by cloth diapering is really just getting plowed back into our grocery budget as I buy more organic now. We also don't buy much that is processed; Annie's Mac N Cheese is about the extent of that, and we don't even eat that all that much anymore.
I don't really bargain shop when it comes to food. We cut back in other ways first, always. For instance, we only drive one car, only have basic cable (and that only because it's cheap bundled with our internet), have one pay-as-you-go cell phone that is rarely used, and use old washcloths as cleaning rags instead of paper towels or disposable wipes. We also cut back on eating out when it seems we are spending too much. I'm really happy with what we are saving and spending, and it always surprises me when people say you don't get paid squat in the military. Really, you just have to know how to spend it (and how NOT to spend it).
We spend around $500 a month for our family of 4 and all of that comes from WalMart. Sadly, there are no Costco's or Trader Joe's or even a decent Farmer's Market. I desperately want to lower that number to around $350, but I'm also wanting to eat healthier and I find that it's more expensive. Haven't figured that whole process out yet.
Thank you so much for this post!! So much great info :) It seems like $400 is a popular amount - well, at least we're not alone! I read all the previous posts and got a few good ideas. Erin has me inspired to plan more ahead - wow! amazing process she has going!
Quite a lot of people shop for groceries at Wal-mart. My general rule for our Wal-mart is to not touch it with a ten-foot pole (it's not nice here), maybe I should check it out again, though.
Shannon talked about how much easier it was for her to stick to her budget back East than out West. I wonder if that has anything to do with it. Our eating habits were changing so much at the same time that we moved, so it was hard to keep track of the change in food prices.
Well its hard to tell for us cuz at Walmart we also buy all the toiletries. But it would be fair to say if I stay really healthy and don't buy crackers and snacky items and stuff the price almost evens out. We spend about $4-500 depending. We are now starting to use the commissary more often and Costco, but the real saver in gas and time and money is, Walmart. They price match just about everything except meat(it will the prepackaged stuff).So if the milk or fruits and veggies are on sale or tp or whatever are on sale at Target or any other store including the local 'Farmers market' ads, I make my list and take my ads and will find a quiet time to shop and tell the tellar every item I bought and for how much its on sale elsewhere and sometimes I show them the ad if they are not sure, but for the most part they know the ads too and will catch some of the stuff before I even tell them. This way I get everyones ads in one stop.
Val in ABQ
I honestly cannot tell you what we spend.
We are a frugal family, but food is one thing where I do not really budget.
I buy stuff on sale, etc., but good food is worth any price, especially if my kids will eat it :)
We used to be in the military and I got on that 1st and 15th going to the commissary routine....we still shop on those days...I go to 2 grocery stores..Walmart and Aldi's and Sam's once a month. I do a meal plan for 2 weeks and stick to it...I eat out one time a week and 1-2 leftovers...lunches and breakfasts and snacks are all included....we spend $500 a month and this includes toiletry s. Diapers too...I watch what we buy and get alot of generic.
Good question, I always wonder what other people spend, if we are in the norm.
Well for us (5) we spend about 700 a month. It crazy, living here in Monterey CA has really pushed our budget to it's seems. We only shop the commissary and Costco.
Just to give you an idea milk is about $5 a gallon in the city store, commissary 3.95, and Costco is 5.45 for two gallons. Anything we use daily comes from Costco.
We sure miss our COLA from Alaska here! It sucks because I think the cost of living is higher here then up there.
I just want to know how people are spending such a small amount???? I cook, everyday, every meal, is this why my monthly food costs are so high??? And we butcher a cow each year, so I don't have to buy any meat at the grocery store! I'm at around $750-800 a month?? What the heck am I doing wrong? Although, I live in IL and it is expensive here!!
I cook from scratch and we don't eat out a lot, I also shop every two weeks because you know we're military and get paid the first and the 15th.
I spend about $250 for two weeks, so I guess about $500 a month, some months more than others, the summer time I seem to spend $300 for two weeks but that's because the kids are home from school and they eat everything but the kitchen sink LOL
I don't think I spend a lot on food, things are expensive nowadays. But one thing that helps me keep in line is making a menu plan every week (been doing it for 10 years) and buying what I need and not just what I feel like throwing in the cart.
For a typical month we spend 400-450 on groceris. But that includes, diapers, formula, paper products, etc. Basically anything and everything. We only shop at the Commissary because prices at Wal-Mart are much too high for everything. We will occassionally have to buy something from WM, but try very hard not to.
We have been spending 'at least' $150 to $200 a week in groceries. So that is about $600 to $800 a month. We are a family of five and I am very frugal! I have tried and tried to stay around $100 a week but it never works. I agree with the comment three comments above me- I too live in Illinois/Wisconsin area (I do my grocery shopping in Illinois)and it 'is' expensive here. Food prices have gone way up! Grrr...
For our family of 3 we spend $180 a month. I shop mostly at the commissary, but also a Wal-Mart, Aldi, and other local stores depending on the sales. The best way we save is by combining coupons with sales. I highly recommend the Money Saving Mom blog for finding the best deals out there. Also, I make a plan and stick to it. We don't always eat what we "want", and I try to use up all leftovers and misc things I have on hand before going to the store. Oh, and most importantly I pray before each trip that God would help me to be wise with my decisions and make the best use of the money He has blessed us with.
I was shocked to see how little people spend on groceries!!! I am not in the military, so no commisary. We are a family of 5 and I would guess we spend $600 - 800/month on groceries. I find that kids snack a lot and it really adds up. I have no idea how people are keeping such low budgets and still buying meats and veggies and fruits. We don't like to skimp on food, we love to eat, so I do try to keep the spending down, but we like what we like and so, it comes to about $150 - 200 a week. Not sure what else we could do differently, but I'm still trying to figure out where we go wrong.
We are right in the process of cutting back now - just started a serious budget a couple weeks ago. Groceries are a bit higher here in Canada, so I am averaging about $100-$150 per week right now, with most of it organic (we have an organic basket delivered once a week, I plan all the meals around that and it's about $45 and is plenty for all of us for one week). We're a family of five, but of course one is not eating yet :-)
I'm saving some b/c I stopped buying a lot of processed foods and am making everything myself now - more time consuming, so much healthier and soooooo much tastier (I realize I don't have to tell you this!!). But I'm continuing to look for ways to cut back . . . things in general are just more money now.
5 people
$400/month
I just switched my family to a preservative, additive and food color free diet and I was scared of what it would do to my budget. But I'm still staying under $100 week! I've found I spend more on my staples, but I no longer buy snack foods or drinks other than milk. My cart is full of things from the "edges" of the grocery store, no more center aisle shopping. Fruits, Vege, Dairy, Meat, whole grains. And I feel so much better about what my family is eating.
I just have to comment too even though I'm a post behind...
I have to agree with your few lone commenters who are confused as to how families of 4 or 5 are only spending $400 a month on groceries. We're spending WAY MORE than that. I'd say closer to $600 per month- and we haven't even started buying diapers again :P
We eat fairly healthy. Not all organic- but certainly not all junk/boxed food that can get expensive. We don't do anything in a box anymore for the kids for snacks. They eat fruit or cheese, etc...I just don't know what else I can cut out without my entire family whining "I'm hungry" constantly.
I think my biggest hurdle in keeping costs down is my husband who is notoriously hungry at 10 at night and commonly runs out to get "just a few things" and ends up with fast food or junk from the nearest grocery store. Let me tell you, that adds up to hundreds of dollars a month after awhile.
I need pointers from other Mom's I guess on how to shop and cook for my family without breaking the bank.
Dang, I'm doing something wrong. I spend about $700 on food for a family of eight. Some other commenters are way cheaper than I am.
I shop at Winco for almost everything. I do have a bad habit of not doing a once a week shop and so I end up going every day or so. That's not a good thing.
We live in the Pacific Northwest so I don't know how we compare in price with other states. I do know our prices are going up, up, up.
I really should be a better shopper. Doing the coupon thing and all but I just don't roll like that.
We follow Dave Ramsey's "Total Money Makeover", so we do all cash. I have $300/month for groceries only (family of 4--a 3 yr. old and 11 mo. old--and my husband and my son eat a LOT). My husband thinks that is too much to spend of food every month (he never goes shopping!)...I just recently convinced him to change it to $300 instead of $250! We eat a lot of fruits and veggies. I did just plant a garden this year, so that is starting to help a little--mostly cucumbers, tomatoes, zuchinni, and grean beans--and I try to get "healthier" foods, but we're not organic or whole grain 100%. We live in the Midwest in a tiny town, so we have to drive an hour round trip to shop at a WalMart. Dilons (Kroger-owned store) here in town is super expensive. Plus I can get all my shopping done (toiletries, household, etc) in one trip. The closest Sam's Club is over an hour away (one way), so it's not cost efficient to do that.
I always shop with a list (otherwise I never get what I really need and spend too much money!). When the cash is gone, it's gone. You learn to get creative :) I have to admit that some months I have to "borrow" cash from another category to get more fresh stuff (juice, milk, fruit), but for the most part I try really hard to stick to the $300. You learn to buy the off-brand, cheapest things (which doesn't always mean sacrificing on taste!). As a kid, we didn't have a ton of money, so I've learned some tricks from my Mom about how to make a meal stretch.
Sorry to leave such a long comment!
PS-please thank your husband for his service to our country. I have a great amount of respect for our service men & women (I have several family memebers myself in the Armed Forces).
VERY cool pictures - she looks like she's about to blast off into the universe . . . what fun!!!
I love her cheer leading outfit....I love moments like this too.
It sure is! The look so happy!
We just did a whole lot of that in the yard tonight, well, Sam did :) There really is nothing better.
I really miss seeing that girl in all her glory. Love ya guys
Absolutely priceless. I just love little Eve.
Oh I'll say!
And I know from experience; just the other day Kevin was tossing me up like that...
Oh. Wait a minute. Maybe I dreamed that I was a super cute cheerleader myself.
Never mind.
Oh. My. Goodness. The cutest pictures ever! Eve looks soooo happy and soooo cute in her outfit. Yep, the best of life!
I could almost HEAR her squealing with delight!!!
So cute! She looks absolutely delighted :)
Very awesome! Great pics :) She looks so happy. Gotta love being a Daddy's girl :)
btw - thanks for the kind words... it meant a lot!
Alicia
Great pics! She looks so happy :)
I also have something for you on my blog...I hope you like it!
I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE these photos!!
A cheerleader in the making maybe? heheh too cute
How cute is she in that cheerleading uniform?
So sweet.
I had a question for you about your dessert for dinner, Do you give them anything else to eat on those nights or is it just the dessert? I want to start that but I'm not sure hubby would go for it?
The moments we make with our children that make them laugh out loud, those are the ones they never forget.
Yes ma'am. This is the stuff of life.
those pictures are just perfect in every way.
Megan
SO CUTE! love it!
brittany
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21 Comments:
Who me, no, I always make dinner! (okay, maybe not so much.) And that is when we order pizza or eat left overs. Thank goodness my family isn't picky!
What kinda sandwiches are those? They look yummy!
I don't have kids yet but I do work 12 hour days at the hospital and I know the feeling of being to tired to cook and we usually do sandwiches or annie's mac n cheese
What an adorable swimsuit Eve has!
I don't always make dinner, in fact, since I've started working Sean actually makes dinner a lot of nights. What a lifesaver! Then there are nights like last night when we get salads and chili-cheese fries from Dairy Queen. :)
I make eggs and potatoes. With tortillas. Diced cubes of potatoes, browned in a little olive oil, then add eggs and scramble. Done. We eat them with tortillas because that's how my grandpa hernandez always ate his eggs...
I think Eve looks SOOO much like you! Your babies are absolutely stunning :)
My 4 year old has that "trouble" look on his face all the time...lol
Oh my goodness! That smile, those rolls, that swim suit & long hair and that wonderful dinner. I wish I were close :)
and btw, I'm not liking those posts from 1 year ago. Thats when we were close and I miss you too much :(
Bean and cheese tortillas. Perhaps the cheapest, easiest, fastest dinner I can muster. Today? They are lunch! :)
I feel ya girl, and I only have 2! My aunt just recently told me that every Sunday night they have sandwich night and I thought, what a great idea. Black Bean Quesadillas are my "go-to" for days like that. Love the pictures of the kids and Eve's little polka dot bikini...how cute!
We do sandwiches. Sometimes I make homemade potato chips with it.
Love those pictures.
Amanda
Yeah...I have days like that...more often than I like to count. Sometimes we do sandwhiches on those days...others we have breakfast (quick & easy)...and probably more than I should...we order pizza!
Adorable pictures!!
We don't really do sandwiches much (not really sure why that is), but I am definitely one to make breakfast for supper. Scramble some eggs, whip up some pancakes and viola...dinner :)
Love Eve's suit by the way!
Nope. Not me. Never. I wouldn't call Big Shooter and have him grab something on the way home. Nope.
I think tonight it will be quesidillas or sandwiches, which ever Drew is in the mood to make! Hopefully.
Yeah, we actually had a sandwich night tonight!
Yay for sandwiches - and great pix of your kids. Love the little muffin top hanging on baby. Adorable. (Did you get your pkg?)
Sandy
That stud is just too dang cute! Eliza in her outfit was adorable! Eve looked like she was having too much fun! Ugh! Your pics capture the essence of exactly what you're trying to convey, nicely done! We had sandwiches tonight! With farm fresh corn on the cob. Mmm!
You have made some SERIOUSLY cute babies!
We do alot of sandwiches in the summer too. Your pictures of the kids are so cute. Love Eve's suit.
Ahhh...the kids are so adorable!
Well, I believe we did the same exact thing for dinner this night!
Eve's bikini is TOO CUTE! Where did it come from??
But even sandwiches look fancy at your house. Your pictures--YOWZA!
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